a writing of mine turned open mic... eh, i don't know

the notebooks i kept were empty plates|
so i never starved, it was always words i ate|
i drank from the banks of fluid thoughts upon planks|
nailed down with the confidence of having faith|
this dull pen scribbles itself dry again and again|
its dullness, resonates beauty from the bud to stem|
-to the roots both deep and shallow|
till there's the white light killing all the shadows|
and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|
all i care about is death and why the 'alive' dies|
my ancestors were full-blooded, but i feel empty inside|
so my pride consists of ink on a cold night|
-where i confide in a tablet and the glow of a light|
this pen writes and writes and replies my eyes|
-with my sacrifice and i-i love it|
the cruel, the few, the school, no one understands|
they probably do, but for me to find out isn't the plan|
i'd rather command words to slabs of wood|
-and cram books that could change my act|
-my pacification of bland and to the no answers when asked|
i'm past passin' shy to my class, i should-i'm going to make an impact|
"remember that quiet guy? that always sat in the back?"|

... and yeah.. that's as far as i got... i'll finish it later but not edit it in... its not meant for that... peace

"i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|
all i care about is death and why the 'alive' dies|"

that is some deep shit
I really liked it

damm, how come no one replying to this? maybe cause they don't get it.... actually I didn't fully understand it, just a few parts, everything else I got... complex no doubt
yo was feeling the flow in this, shit had rhythm to me... nice vocab and wordplay yo...

-1-

Yo, good drop, I hear what Alias is sayin, most cats probabaly don't get it, some pieces i had to read twice but yeh shit was deep, only advice I could give yo is to have a fully consistent rhyme scheme then it will flow to the full!

Peace Out Yo!!!!

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<center></center><center>Click Here.</center>

damn mofo this shit was ill. newbies take note. this was solid, iron man from top to bottom. had everything, truely likin this.

stay up!!!

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the one that watches the watchmen:

too deep to try and decipher at the moment... might come back when i feel 'at peace with the birds and nature etc etc'.... good drop... nice everything... keep rhymin

and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|

dude i agree with 12cent,
awesome rhyme bro

Man this was dope....Tha rhyme fell off a little at sum parts....But tha concept held it up....Tha deepness was dope....

and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|

I thought that was the best line in tha piece....Keep writin' man...Peace

"this dull pen scribbles itself dry again and again|
its dullness, resonates beauty from the bud to stem|"

yea, this shit was straight.. deep doesn't even describe shit in this rhyme.... there seems to be some hidden inner meanings that I found, read over this like six times and still don't fully get the whole thing.. but yo, It's good..

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This Was Nice Kidd .

Flow All That Was On Point

I Liked The Opening, Dope .

Dope Peice Fellow.

*cough*