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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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Flyweight
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off the top..tryin somethin
IP: C1DA C961
I havent tried to rhyme in two years so be gentle..lol
Complex reality just bit the dust, I must travel through manageries till I can really trust// Lust is old as time itself, it melts through plastic and burns through wood// We stood unable to grasp the mishaps, the gaps, the traps we set ourselves// It helps if you can understand life, the fright the fear unknown// Shown to us as we grow older, standin shoulder to shoulder never knowin hunger like a voulcher// But in despair we hold tight, we try to share, realize the rare, we don't fight// Tonight is the night we try to live in peace, wether it's mother, brother, or niece// People of the world hold together, sharin memories of the past forever// Have a simple reason, never sly or treason, come as one while we celebrate this season// Meanin..... We all know wrong from right, at the end of the tunnel the lights bright// Don't jeopardize the future of the young tykes, just b/c you have your likes n dislikes//
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<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3> <BR> <BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I> |
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Flyweight
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IP: C1DA C961
now that i read it myself after its posted i fell off really badly
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<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3> <BR> <BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I> |
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Guest
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IP: 67BC 68DD
it was alright, some lines just seemed to be put in there for padding...but the topic was good...flow was mad choppy, sometimes i had to re-read the lines, which isnt always good...but the lines that you had and flowed were good cuz they were all on point with the topic...just keep getting better in everyway...expand vocabulary and everything...we all need too, me especially...nice work though
holla at one of mine "Figure me out" and "Too easy" peace |
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Flyweight
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IP: C1DA C961
thanx.
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<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3> <BR> <BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I> |
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Guest
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IP: 19AF 50C1
i think over all it was a most enjoyable read yeah filler lines seams soft but hey so the fuck what there is no perfect rhyme analyzing your rhyme i thought it was a great read.
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1E
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IP: A024 FEC1
yeah i thought this was a decent read, the flow was ok for most, the topic was alright...yeah not a bad drop.........
i would work on your rhymin tho.....peace! |
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Flyweight
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IP: C1DA C961
thanx once again...
__________________
<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3> <BR> <BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I> |
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Guest
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IP: 3CAA FAA2
pretty deep i feel anything that has to do with knowledge and life keep working-"ONE"
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