http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...15&pagenumber=1
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...4554#post984554
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...4559#post984559
Chrous
Comerical Rapper Feed Off Young Minds,Quicker Than Vultures..
But,These People Will Soon Have Kids What Will They Do When Older?..1
They've Reached The Battlefield,Now TRL This Is New To Them A Diffrent Turf..
They Are All About Guns Now,What Has Happened To This HipHop Culture?..2
Verse One
I'm Here To Take Rap Music Over..Just Some Lryical Domanation~This Stuff You Don't Get Paid For Just A Willing Occupation..
This Shit Starts In My Basement~Been Doing This Shit For Years It's Become A Life Long Dedication..1
You Have To Work For This,You Just Can't Put It On Your Christmas List~Emcee's Die In War Loose Self-Confidence Cause They Got Dissed..
For Young Emcees Coming Up In The Game,They Lose A Battle Now They Think Their Goal Is Missed~But You've To Work Harder To Surpass It..2
I'm Gonna Loose Paitents~For Some..This Isn't About The Music,It's About The Cars And Tint..3
But To Me Personally,Hip Hop Has Died...A Lryical Earthquake,Suppourted By Social Ambressions..
It Doesen't Matter If Your Black,White Or Asain~Mc's Are So Desprate Nowadays They Are Rapping About Hotel Reservations..4
Rappers Have Reached A Climax Their Done~Basically They Are Trying To Go Back To Sqaure One..
Nothing Left..All Their Money Is Spent~Tupac Has Now Died,The Only Real Emcee Now HipHop Has Gone Into Toxication..5
Chrous
Comerical Rapper Feed Off Young Minds,Quicker Than Vultures..
But,These People Will Soon Have Kids What Will They Do When Older?..1
They've Reached The Battlefield,Now TRL This Is New To Them A Diffrent Turf..
They Are All About Guns Now,What Has Happened To This HipHop Culture?..2
(Repeat 2x)
Verse Two
These Lryics Touch Their Little Teenage Sensitive Ears,Their Hooked Minds Blown..
They Pick Up The Pen,Start Writting But It Isn't As Easy To Touch The Chrome..1
Teenagers Think They Can Sell Records,Since They Came From A Broken Home..
But These Rappers Aren't Real:Must Of Their Freestyles Aren't Off The Dome..2
They Thought As Young Kids..Things Aren't Going My Way This Isn't Fair...
Then They Look At Jay-Z,I Used To Look Up To Him But He's Too Rich To Care..3
Now It's 2003 New Artists Have Come Along Like 50cent They Sat In Anticapation..
He Comes Out With A New Album Is This Really What Comes Of Elavation?..4
But Beef Comes Then~They Wanna Battle A Quick Round Of Ten..
But Me,I'm The Lryical President,Off To Bulid A New HipHop Nation..5
Chrous
Comerical Rapper Feed Off Young Minds,Quicker Than Vultures..
But,These People Will Soon Have Kids What Will They Do When Older?..1
They've Reached The Battlefield,Now TRL This Is New To Them A Diffrent Turf..
They Are All About Guns Now,What Has Happened To This HipHop Culture?..2
(Repeat 2x)
Verse Three
These Young Kids Listen To These Explicit Lryics,Nothing But Cuss Words Fill Their Mind..
All These Rappers Just Want To Make Music,They Don't Know Exactly Where To Draw The Line..1
Everyone Raps About Sexual Lryics..No One Knew This Would Drive People To Aids..
People At Record Labels Diden't Care They Just Wanted To Pursue Thug Way..2
No Boundries Fenced~No One Knew What Would Transpire In Up And Coming Events..
Then You Hear About A Shooting At A High School,This Has Finally Lead To Volence..3
Even Though Most Emcee's Fell Asleep In History,You Depend Freedom Of Speech..
People Don't Care How Your Music Is Heard,Or Sold Just As Long As You Can Live On The Beach..4
When You Guys Should Donate To Charity~They've To Write About Guns..Not Something Good That You Could Put Under Your Chirstmas Tree..5
Most Of The People Listen To Hiphop..They Don't Have Jobs They Live Off Choclate,Go To Church And Listen To People Preech..
So Take A Seat~Just Give Me Time,I'm The Lryical Teacher,Here To Spread Peace And Teach..6
Chorus
Comerical Rapper Feed Off Young Minds,Quicker Than Vultures..
But,These People Will Soon Have Kids What Will They Do When Older?..1
They've Reached The Battlefield,Now TRL This Is New To Them A Diffrent Turf..
They Are All About Guns Now,What Has Happened To This HipHop Culture?..2
(Repeat 2x)
Uppin
1

Up

This was an alright drop. The chorus was way to stretched though. Same with alot of your lines in there. You did use pretty good vocab, and its an alright topic. But it just didnt grab my attention. This was a pretty good drop hommie...
---> Can you return the favor and peep " Deacon Diss " in my sig and tell me what you think about it, replie to it... Aight hommie.

OUT

-High Class a.k.a Confusion

__________________

Thanks a lot man^
I was trying a little bit of a Nas style,Mixed with Can-I-Bus.That's how it came out,uppin this
1

Yeah this was alright i thought....structure could use some work though, lines were way stretched out there like High Class said...should try to shorten them down a bit so it doesnt take away from the flow in this...your vocab though in this was good i thought....but overall this was alright...keep at it.

ayo playa... i think this ish was hella dope playa... u need to go audio... or let me steal this ..lol jk jk
.. good ass peice... i give it a 8/10 ... fa sho dunny... i was feelin it... cuz i'm one of them teenagers..lol

caesar on3

this was an alright drop...

needs some work on structure and chorus is alittle streched

good use of vocab.....

overall 6.5/10

keep droppin

__________________

This needs work
The Vocab Was ight but you didnt flow
it too well.. n' The whole "taking Over"
shit is tired.. So dont spit bout that

^I Rushed The Piece,It Was Like 10:00 When I Keyed This-Thanks For The Feedback

needs alot of work. structure man it's all about structure

God Your Hard To Please^
Look Past The Structure,Sure My Structure Isn't That Great,I'm Not Perfect.Just Look Past it And You'll See How Great The Piece Really Is.
1

Uppin'

I don't think it's all about structure. Thre greats don't give a fuck about structure and neither do I. Some of my best punches come when I just write. Good work yo.