some story tellin' shit....

the girl was on the way home, all alone, just got a new ringtone on her mobile phone//
she wasnt a girl that was overrun by hormones, she'd never grown to love any the past guys she known//
but she was all alone//
meanwhile, three guys were joking, goding themselves, coaxing themselves untill they were hoping themselves//
and boasting to themselves, and voting themselves, to all gather round and hold down anyone just someonelse//
so while these guys were in a dupe, this girl thought she had a chance to re-group//
while they thought about nook//
they didnt want someone in thier age-group, they didnt want to cause themselves a bloop, so they began to become a troop//
She’d just been crazy, with her boyfriend just lately, they’d had an argument so she didn’t tell him she was carrying his baby//
She thought just maybe…he wont hate me, she looked up at the stars and prayed ’God please save me’//
they knew what they were after, by this time they'd allready ran past her, untill they decided to cast her//
For the role//
the bastards, they even laughed at her, they were so insensitive that after, they'd have even come and bathed her//
they dragged her from the pavement and hid her in a nearby basement, she was patient even though she wasnt the vagrant//
they went vacant, so she pulled herself up on a casement, she became strong and became the claiment//
These boys should have had a coupla bullest through em’, or at least sue em’, they shoulda got what was cumin’ like it was runnin’ to em’//
That girl once loved life, had a boyfriend and was about to be a mother and become a wife//
These boys ruined not just hers, but a chain of lives…not even knowin’ this girl has her sleeves rolled up, holdin’ a knife//
This girl was beautiful, she woulda suited y’all, now she’s in the clinic getting’ seamen swabbed from under her cuticle//
How come its never woman that rape men, women are wonderful, hold our kids but we rape them//
she had once been the winner of the local beauty pageant, now the headlines read "LOCAL GIRL GIVES STATEMENT"//



what y'all think?

__________________
Knowledge Is King

i forgot about the link thing....

im sorry by credz
american genocide by armo
i just wanna talk by formula MC

__________________
Knowledge Is King

BUMP....come on people........please, i need some feedback......c'mon.............tell me what you think of this....

__________________
Knowledge Is King

i think this piece was really good. didn't know were it was going at first but towards the end it came together. good emotion and flow. keep it up

__________________
Crazy spit, her shyt be emaculate...oNe

..This was average..your structure was fucked up...your vocab was below average..but I for some reason like shit like this..I like the content..don't know why???...work on your scheme and vocab..peace..

Good. Some weak rhymes but not to bad. Like the way it came together at the end.

__________________

yo....thanks...it was a experimental flow ya know what i mean? i just wanted to tell a story an' shit...thanks for the feedback, keep it cummin'....

http://www.gangsonline.com/go.php?p=1052

__________________
Knowledge Is King

tight tight i like it