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Old 08-02-02, 07:53 AM   #1
Jay Dee
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"My Hatred" - Feedback Please

IP: 07E0 A9F2

I just wrote this in a half an hour or so, maybe longer, feedback please people,

Yo I got beefs on my hands, I avoid a fight,
It seems that im in a tunnel and at the end no light,
It seems like I keep running round the track still no end in site,
It seems not safe to be out at dark, after light,
Cause Im growing older by the day, I wanna keep away from strife,
Cause in the time on earth you only get one life,
Blow it and you don’t get a sequel, there is no living twice,
I try to be myself theres no equal, conducting myself nice,
Cause with all this im sick of this unmeaningness,
All this nonsensical chat means nothing to me,
The hatred I have for these people is incommunicable,
Cause if you fuck with me my hate for you is indescribable,
I will strike like clockwork precision, I will be Mr. Regularity,
To the ones in question I hope its clear this is supposed to be clarity,
When it come to you, Im operating intent,
Cause you’re a fag, go get bent,
Cause in reflection of this situation, I just end up mad,
As if Im looking in the mirror and my reflection is screaming back,

Cause Ive found out things about you, I know them for a fact, Cause when this is said and done youll be wishing you could turn the time back,
In this scenario, Ive been hesitant, paused before replying,
Cause if I said I really wanted to have to do shit Id be lying,
Im gonna make you screech like a crow, bellow with ache and sufferance,
Cause after its done ill be the one having one over,
But inside I expect Ill still feel some discomposure,
Cause what have you achieved by trying to offend me,
Nothing more than just another bitter enemy,
Cause the way I feel im will to do whatever, readily,
But Im still not about to get caught Im a pro, I operate cleverly,
Not like the person in question my foe, who operates sporadically,
No prior planning acting on nothing but misjudgement,
This verse has been some what of a vent,
To spit out my anger and dissent,
Cause Ive said it once before go get bent,

Feedback please good or bad,

Last edited by Jay Dee : 08-02-02 at 07:55 AM.
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Old 08-02-02, 07:56 AM   #2
Jay Dee
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IP: 07E0 A9F2

The gap in the middle shouldnt be there, I dont know why its done that, tried to alter it but it wouldnt do it,
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Old 08-02-02, 09:20 AM   #3
Katastrafy
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good

IP: 0ACF 783E

i think it was good from what i understood but you jump topic
__________________
"Streets like a bullet in cancer, it'll swallow you up
or eat you from the inside and hollow you up."- Beanie Sigel

"Stare gun in face
heart flutters dawg it's startin to race
stuck in my place
nowhere to turn, nowhere to go
death right around the corner soon as the gauge exsplode"- Me
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Old 08-02-02, 10:55 AM   #4
Jay Dee
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Thumbs up

IP: 07E0 A9F2

Thanks for the feed man, much appreciated,

Uppin for more
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Old 08-02-02, 06:03 PM   #5
Jay Dee
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

IP: A024 FEC1

Uppin
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