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Old 07-04-05, 08:28 AM   #1
BiZzO
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Valley Of Bones....Our Demise..

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A Valley of Bones....

"Our Bones are dried-up and our hope is gone; we are cut off."-Ezekiel 37:11

The Pressure's threshold explodes upon our Nation-Of-People
Citizens are Pacin'-On-Steeples, while more terror attacks Stations-Of-Feeble
Satan's harbinger lingers and Stalks-In-Shadows
It Walks-In-Mallows, waitin as it Flocks-In-Shallows
The innocence live out, while chaos Bleeds-Out-Rain
famine lacks, we Feed-The-Lame; while collared priests use Creed-For-Fame
Our mind state slates traits for us to Block-The-Light
Media's Locked-On-Whites, we fail to stand and Stop-Their-Plights
Our soldiers fall in disgrace's face and we hear our Grace-In-War?
Our men are Chased-N-Scorned, but will America ever be able to Face-The-Gore?
The corrupt erupts its evil stench that Taints-The-Air
Pain Faints-Our-Care, cuz like 'artists in church' we just 'Paint-Our-Prayers'
A breath's spite snaps a 'death-rite' that 'Sends-My-Fears'
Clarity Bends-And-Smears, as the clouds thicken, we know the End-Is-Near....

"...When I Open Your Graves, and Bring You Up From Them..."-Ezekiel 37:13

We're polluted..from women's Sad-Prattle to eatin from Mad-Cattle
Capitol Hill sits on Plaid-Saddles, while the prez fights Dad's-Battle!!
Man's hand spans turmoil, from Alleys-Of-Thrones passed to a Rally-Of-Clones
its our own charred-names that scar veins, melt our generation, now a Valley-Of-Bones

.....Our Government, LifeStyle, Lack Of Action Has Been The Source Of Our Emaciation.....
.....Its We, the Unattentive People...which Allow Such Pandamonium for Proclamation......
.....What religions teach, what we accept as the Truth, in reality Blinds Our Minds......
.....Soon we will allow ourselves to be Robots, when lil chips just Climb Our Spines.....

It is We, The People.....Who Can We Trust in God....and Rely Fully On A Gov't Of Lies

It is The Wrath of Satan's Lost Paradise, that we are now the peeps in a Valley of Bones
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Old 07-04-05, 07:26 PM   #2
BiZzO
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BuMp, BuMp, BuMp!!!
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Old 07-04-05, 07:30 PM   #4
Kawn Flixx
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Drop a link or this will be closed
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Old 07-04-05, 07:31 PM   #5
BiZzO
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werd, ill get a link now.
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Old 07-04-05, 07:33 PM   #6
BiZzO
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Old 07-04-05, 07:53 PM   #7
BiZzO
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BuMp BuMp BuMp!!
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Old 07-04-05, 11:43 PM   #8
WiseWun
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very very nice .. imagery was definitely there .. vocabs were koo .. creativity was nice .. your multies were definitely on point .. and i liked how you quoted Biblical Sayings through out your verse .. but one thing .. it could have been longer .. thats the only thing that dissappointed me .. but a very nice piece ..keep it up man ..goodjob
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Old 07-05-05, 02:36 AM   #9
BiZzO
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thankyou! more feed please!!
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Old 07-05-05, 05:30 AM   #10
BiZzO
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stop sleepin on this BuMp
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Old 07-05-05, 06:46 AM   #11
DQ
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Nice piece, feeling the concept you worked with here, good how you used quotes of Ezekiel in between parts. Flow was hot like whoa, multis, nice rhyming words, internal rhyming...very good. Vocab was definitely on point, good amount of complexity in your words. Imagery was there, could picture what you were saying. Emotion was strong, had some deep insightful lines in there that kept readers focussed.

Solid piece!
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Old 07-05-05, 06:47 AM   #12
BiZzO
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thankyou very much!
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Old 07-05-05, 08:36 PM   #13
BiZzO
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more feedback please!!!!!
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Old 07-05-05, 08:40 PM   #14
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good piece i liked over all good for real keep it up

rtf in my open mic:

http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=198264
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Old 07-05-05, 11:15 PM   #15
BiZzO
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werd, uppin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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