RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > New Release Songs
Reload this Page My Life
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 12-17-05, 06:12 PM   #1
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
Exclamation My Life
IP:

Its Short
A straight up Street Track
Gutter ass flow to it
Grimey soundin beat


My Life

Give me some honest feedback



I got some extra time on the beat if anyone else wants to get on it. *ahem*

I left feed on;
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=217290
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=217163
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=217226
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-05, 08:21 PM   #2
Tha Q.
OYD
 
Tha Q.'s Avatar
 
Posts: 10,036
IP:

beat is rockin

Will...u need to dub ur verse and pan them more than u do...will give ur vocals more presence

and ur vocals need to be amped some


I like ur delivery on this

u needed jus a tad more breath control for some of ur lines


but I like this


"cocky but humble"....is that possible?



holla


1
Send a message via AIM to Tha Q.   Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-05, 08:47 PM   #3
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
IP:

Thanks For The Feed.
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-05, 08:52 PM   #4
Lethal GK
Light Weight
 
Lethal GK's Avatar
 
Posts: 299
From: Columbus, Georgia
IP:

a I actually liked this, vocals needed to be a little bit lower to blend in with the beat, and like Q said bout the overdubbin is true maybe you should of overdubbed your whole verse 1 time, but then came back and overdubbed your main words that you felt should of been heard, like you had already done, your flow is what caught my attention pretty good shit, nah sayin
__________________


www.soundclick.com/lethalgk
Send a message via AIM to Lethal GK   Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-05, 10:48 PM   #5
Tha Q.
OYD
 
Tha Q.'s Avatar
 
Posts: 10,036
IP:

Send a message via AIM to Tha Q.   Reply With Quote
Old 12-18-05, 11:53 AM   #6
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
IP:

alright Lethal, I'll remember to do that next time.
ok, uppin for some more feed.
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Old 12-18-05, 12:08 PM   #7
noname
Coming to Kill you All
 
noname's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,424
IP:

YOUR VOCALS ARE TO FUCKING LOUD!!!!!!
.And your lyrics are decent...except for the daydream/night mare shit..I heard the same shit from NAs.But then again,your Will.Sun..I can't expect originality from you .
And ur delivery sounded wackk..
But really tho,I think ya got a vioce for a rapping.It's somewhat similar to Big L in my opinion..

So,yea...
Send a message via AIM to noname   Reply With Quote
Old 12-18-05, 12:22 PM   #8
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
IP:

Thanks
I'll take as a compliment comin from Natural Killa
Cod you usually be like
"this wack you gay "

so, umm, yeah. Word
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Old 12-19-05, 01:33 AM   #9
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
IP:

uppin man
damn
............
...............
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Old 12-19-05, 01:53 AM   #10
Ltizzle
Seattle Hat Wit A Lean
 
Ltizzle's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,235
From: Seattle
IP:

this beat remind me A LOT of some song i been listening to lately
cant remember what though =/

anyways
the delivery was kinda coo
real original, which i like...cause i consider myself to have a unique delivery, so i like seeing kids do it too
flow is nice, lyrics is hot
overall it is a pretty gutter track like you said

and word to "rubix cubes" that my favorite line
good work fam, only thing i say upped would be quality...hopefully you got rapgame on lock.
nice
__________________



---------------------------
Lucky Boy Beats: Owner & Producer
http://www.myspace.com/luckyboybeats
----------------------------------------------
Gunn Play: Rv's Original Duo
Dash Canceling To A Computer Near You

MAS ON EM! 4 LIFE
Send a message via AIM to Ltizzle   Reply With Quote
Old 12-19-05, 02:39 AM   #11
Static
Get Soul Clapped E-Style]
 
Posts: 7
From: Texas Mutha Fucka Datz Were I Stay!
IP:

beats dope as hell yo
vocals are too loud
delivery was nice
flow mad nice fam
quality was iight
but overall dis was a nice lil track
keep droppin hot tracks mayne
Send a message via AIM to Static Send a message via MSN to Static Send a message via Yahoo to Static   Reply With Quote
Old 12-20-05, 03:25 AM   #12
..Decree..
The Rulers Back
 
..Decree..'s Avatar
 
Posts: 4,496
From: Queens,NY
IP:

Beat is dope

About yo vocals they already touched on that flow was good same for delivery you really comin up son liked this track overall not much more i can say but get a new mic lol keep droppin son =1=
__________________
O.wning Y.ou D.aily

Y.ou Know My Style 20 Niggas Wit 40 Cals
Send a message via AIM to ..Decree..   Reply With Quote
Old 12-20-05, 11:54 PM   #14
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
Zone Out's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,430
From: Westside Detroit
IP:

^my voice is sexy, chico
__________________
www.myspace.com/zoneout1

Rap Extraordinaire

Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
Send a message via AIM to Zone Out   Reply With Quote
Reply

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes
Hybrid Mode Hybrid Mode

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:30 AM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.