{Chorus: Dido}

[Eminem as 'Stan']
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
this'll be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped +ALL+ of your pictures off the wall
I love you Slim, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Slim; {*screaming*} Shut up bitch! I'm tryin to talk!
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screamin in the trunk
but I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how'm I supposed to send this shit out?
{*car tires squeal*} {*CRASH*}
.. {*brief silence*} .. {*LOUD splash

I wrote you a letter last year and you must'a not got it
I picked up ya latest album and I almost lost it
slim I don't think i would be here if it wasn't for you
cuz whatever u say is real and I respect you dude
I wish one day we could meet that would mean so much
cuz im just like you my lifes been just as tough
Your like my biggest idol man I think you've done really well
I wish my life was yours cuz my life seems to have fell
your my biggest idol i'll keep writing to you when i can
cuz I need' 2 talk to you and your my biggest fan
I listen to your songs daily I hope your looking after haily
im really sorry about that school bully called D angelo baily
I miss you all the time so you've got to keep mailing me
I can't undertand at home why my mum tries failing me
when I look up on my bed room wall it's not so bad
cuz I can relate to you instead of feeling so sad
I've got to go now I've got to get some sleep
but don't ever froget how much you mean to me

sencearly yours stan