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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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Banned: Compromised Account
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4:31 am (living in death)
IP: 6236 079F
it's now 4:31 but I just can't seem to get my ass-to-the-bed...
with all the cats-that-have-bled... the only thing I can think about's a gat-to-my-head... please no don't die is the last-thing-I-said... no longer am I packin-some-lead and stashin'-my bread... I can't open my eyez my time'z no longer elapsing...I'm dead... shit-is-absurd when ya vision-is-blurred my spit-has-been-cursed a bottomless pit-has-emerged ... as my "skin dissentigratez" till it starts to "get-on-my-nervez"... I ain't a murderer... but please don't tempt-me-to-try... it's in-me-to-die...without remembering-why... if my life'z filled with pain then why do I feel empty inside... dismembering-thoughts the trinity'z-sought... I can't seem to buy shit but a disfiguring-corpse... with all the treasurez my memories-bought... remembering-not to do what my ancesstoral entitiez-taught... like a disease this shit-will-be-caught... I'm figuring that by the time you hear this as you listen-I-rot... I swore my greatest protection would be weaponz-of-flesh... strapped a vest-on-my-chest I thought I was the best-of-the-best but I figured wrong instead-I'm-depressed... cause the only way I could learn my greatest life lesson-was death... |
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BANNED
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IP: 6F23 51B6
Not a bad piece for that late at night, flow was a little shaky to start with but you picked it up as you went on, multi's were consistant with the verse, could of used more internals in my opinion, i got the wordplay in this, you didnt need to use the quotation marks, good vocabulary, original topic, all in all not a bad piece, props.
Reply to my "Time Travellin`" Piece! |
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: 399E F0FD
^^^thanks for the feed...it flowed at 1st but I just made it look like that so the linez would be more even...
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: 399E F0FD
oh yeah...already peeped ya piece...
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Yes I Know
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IP: 9B91 D0C6
yeah i agree, i'm a great fan of mulites and i think they make a verse tight, this verse had good flow and like above said the multies were consistent all the way through which i liked, TIGHT VERSE dawg, nice
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: 399E F0FD
thank ya kindly COM...
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: 4577 CD9A
uppin'....
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Guest
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IP: 07FA B39D
not bad for a late night freestyle.
f my life'z filled with pain then why do I feel empty inside... ^^i liked that line alot as my "skin dissentigratez" till it starts to "get-on-my-nervez"... ^^really like that one too not a bad free, u got some skills dawg, keep this shit flowin |
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: C1DA C961
^^^thank ya Pax...
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: C1DA C961
still uppin'...
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Banned: Compromised Account
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IP: C1DA C961
Quote:
yup... |
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