Intro:
It seems countries,full of poverty
Rulers,needing all such soverignity/
Wise Proverbs, express what we need/
To blind to see, /
slowin down with a lil hit of speed./
Maybe...I'm lost, my mind can't be found/
I wanna be heard,but when I speak,out comes no sound/
I lost my sanity, My thoughts in revolution/
New Ideas hated, similiar to Darwin and Evolution/
I lost my body, My mind lost control/
Enter:Nervous System,sending impulses,to look for my soul/

My Brain trapped in my skull,what lies underneath/
Is my spinal cord, sending messages needed in me/
Even as I type now, my nervous system is in effect/
To quick to regret, But new ideas are quick to reject/
I must've lost what little sanity, I thought I once had/
I've been lost and had no pity,'till I entered God's Land/
I'm emotional, And I seem to let my emotions get a hold/
Of my body, my thoughts, what comes out if I spoke/
Simple enough for lamemens term to understand it/
But complex enough, to make you think about,leave you stranded/
My thoughts enter my mind, my brain is to comprehend/
seperates good and bad thoughts, meant for enemies or for friends/

and thats where I stopped...looking for any criticism or helpful tips. Feedback please!

__________________
Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?!

aight here we go

the flow was off at times
the vocab was well above par (good vocab)
multis lacked... i like multis... let me know when part 2 come out

if you would be so kind
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81665

this was a alright peice i thought, decent read, your flow could have been better it was off at some points, your vocab was very nice i liked that, could have used some more multies, but overall it was a good peice, keep dropping.