I gotta stay on top to many enemies wan't me dead/
When it's my turn to go, let it be one shot into my head/
Not wishing death early but if it comes i'll be prepared/
cremate my body all of a sudden my ashes begin to dissapear/
My sorrow swallow my pride and i keep my head up/
But all my niggaz seem to die dropping like some cigarrete butts/
These troubles hunting me like a lost soul need a place to go/
Wherever I go it turns cold reaching up a bove all of these demons they pull me down/
Feeling helpless all the kids turn away with a frown/
Pushing me away can't forgive my mom for giving me away/
But It's ok the man you see will be alright today/
Sometimes i wander was i ready to be in this world/
I pray to god show me heaven doors and let me in/

That's pretty deep. I would recommend adding more wordplay, metas and multies to your piece, to give it a good flow. Otherwise good drop, you'll elevate soon enough as long as you stay active.

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What the fuck is this?