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Old 10-15-03, 08:08 PM   #1
AbbyNinja
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First Freestyle

IP: 509D 5063

This is my first freestyle, giv me some feedback on what u think.

They call me ninja coz i am quick,
and slick,
and i don't giv a shit,
and when i'm on da mic,
i don't rhyme polite,
i don't ride a trike like snoop and x who ride da mic,
and rhymes are tight,
and are ready 2 fight,
all day and night,
so mans in da dark are shifty,
and mans are playing hard like 50,
so they can play da game,
and have da fame,
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Old 10-15-03, 09:04 PM   #2
MonStar
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ok, you got some work to do....flow needs work...work on your structure, like try and make your lines around the same length....and try and lengthen your lines also...also try to add some multies to help with the flow....vocab needs work...your vocab was really simple and could us alot of uppin....content, nothing really original and kinda boring...you got some work to do but keep dropping and you'll get better....the more you write the better you'll get....
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Old 10-15-03, 09:10 PM   #3
Dirty Sally
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^^^^
Exactly what he said.

Just stay active, keep dropping verses and your sure to elevate.
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What the fuck is this?
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Old 10-15-03, 09:14 PM   #4
Sureal
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You Suck.
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Old 10-15-03, 09:16 PM   #5
-ElocuShun-
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^lol^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^nah freestylin is an art.....ya jus gotta learn more............good effort anyways.........i salute ya for tryin
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Old 10-15-03, 10:27 PM   #6
e.coli
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yeah good effort. you need to look at some other peoples open mics or battles so u can get a feel for what they should look like. just keep droppin open mics u will get better.

keep elevatin
...................................
holla
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Old 10-15-03, 11:02 PM   #7
Deadly Game
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u suk
that is all
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Old 10-15-03, 11:02 PM   #8
Deadly Game
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u needa get more mulites in it
ut u overall are horiblle
clsoe this shit
this kids weak
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Old 10-15-03, 11:03 PM   #9
Deadly Game
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his flows he thiks sins ya
but it aint heat u jsut a japanese ninja
thinkin u ill cuz u spit wit bars
but its just them fukin sars
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Old 10-15-03, 11:05 PM   #10
DªÖ
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stop freeposting.
or get banned.
by the way kid if this is how u free then this is how u free
but just work on a style u like
not what other cats do. but whatever. go learn.
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Old 10-16-03, 12:46 AM   #11
Sureal
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^Dont Pretend To Be A Mod, Or get Banned. Hoe.
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