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Lost
IP: A96C 749F
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...6646#post986646
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...6650#post986650 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...6652#post986652 ya, my first piece here so check it out have you ever been so full of the negative shit that yo chest was ready to explode? listen up can u tell me what it feels like to be rotten inside when you made it down so far that you think god is a lie I can, so just sit back and take a hop in my life and find out what Im doin to be so fuckin aside of everything that makes a live normal, a joy or a wonder its outer space, the clouds are grey and they destroy like a thunder its seriously impossible to pass all these obstacles here Im droppin a tear daily cause every goddamn walk is a fear I got a feelin that Im not doin anythin that important for my life, but than every second I sing is a fortune call me maybe crazy and trapped, shady n whack but I gotta write and roc a mic, I cant be lazy like that Im walkin down the empty street think of clowns and them release an album and they whack, and they think they tight on sampled beats and just sit around maybe then Im gettin back to reality pain, fear an jealousy are the kings of my galaxy [chorus] Im lost in the world (4x) [verse two] when I grab a mic I just feel free to say what I want sabres and sons, cables and fun, labels or guns it doesnt matter, how come nobody never wanted my skill never say Im ill, reach my hand or honor whats real I never found out, my mom always wants me to be sumthin special, so she tells me "Son, once you be free" tons of the believes did in my head like flowers in winter I never be the winner, just the slave of cowards n sinners but maybe thats the point maybeyou gotta take what you get Im a loser but I can rap, others are lazy and fat everybody what he deserves, not that Im down with the shit I rather drown in the shit, sound as I quit, be loud as a bitch every human being is authentic made so actually when its late Im sittin there thinkin bout me and the whole che-mis-tray that holds the world together, either you a saint or a knight maybe I suck and Im a loser, but I never change what Im like [chorus] Im lost in the world (4x) soon to be audio |
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IP: 0D0F 4B09
come on, hit me wit sum feedback yo
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Banned
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IP: BD18 BFF7
started out good but then just kept getting wacker and wacker
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Word.
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IP: 340D 8B8F
This was alright i thought....structure was alright, could be touched up a bit though i think....flow in this was alright, fell off at some points as i was reading through it though....you had some good multies...overall this was a alright piece...keep at it.
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1E
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IP: 5AF5 5CA5
i thought ya first verse was better than the second....it seems like ya put all ya effort into that..then jus lost interest...the vocab was really basic aswell..but the first was ok...pZ
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IP: 19AF 50C1
it was a solid drop the intro brought such strength........then died down it wasnt bad but its like starting at the climax and then ending the reader wont be satisfied.
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IP: 6F61 0E58
noo good try again
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IP: BCDB B43E
aight even if it sounds dumb but Im glad yall saw that, that always been my problem with writin lyrics, 1st verse is pretty dope and than it keeps on fallin off cause I lose creativity and good thoughts, how you think can I get rid of that. Take time for second and third verse like wait a week or sumthin like that?
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New to RB
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IP: F354 9C29
I thought this was cool....structure was alright, ....flow in this was cool, fell off at times as i was reading through it though....you had some niiice multies...Twas' a cool piece.. Jus keep on rhymin..
6.5 / 10 -Skribbz
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