this is a piece i did awhile back but was never reopened and i decided to make it longer and add some stuff... word

b4 it is writen a rhyme is non existent.
but once lead to the pad it becomes persistent.
for ever to be seen, a legend in the making.
once writen to the pad the ink stops shaking.
it drys and then becomes permanently stained.
once it is complete the verse it self is explained.
comes together like a story never been told.
piece by piece the story starts to unfold.
from made up "truths" to humble lies.
weather heard or seen it brings tears 2 the eyes.


from ink to pad a journey takes a roll.
a story for those seen by the anti-social.
from all walks of life, it is expressed threw ink.
everything we do, we do it threw ink.


when held in the pen, something never told.
ink can take any form, even that of gold.
it becomes bold, seen by those who believe.
the naive dont care. cus they dont percieve.
some decieve. but others tell the truth.
ink on pad expressed from the young youth.
its like camoflauge seen only by the chosen.
others stare blankly seeming that there frozen.
and they get mad, when there rhymes come out bad.
cus they dont know the journey of the ink to the pad.

it takes skill and wisdom to make somethin come alive.
a journey from the ink to the pad is where it all lies.
where all eyes form a door way to another road.
seeing the dry ink makes a real story unfold.
like it doesnt have to be told but just watched like amovie.
when i write i express what this world means to me.
and to be me is to be me so beyouself on the pad.
express the shit u love now and write bout wut u had.
be glad that we are blessed with skill to be bold.
like i was once told, the ink in the pen is wut is really made of gold.
use it wisely. cus once dry the story cant be erased.
so make sure u sure wut u write on the papers face.
make it follow the race of the journy from ink to pad.
cus this makes u think if it was really a dream i had.

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=226386
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=227884

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

I liked this piece alot. It was a cool concept... Kinda makes a person feel excitied about writing.. I though this was a really good read, but I'd like to make one suggestion...

Your flow can improve greatly in this piece...and also really improve the read. All you have to do is focus on rewording some lines here or there... For ex.

"it drys and then becomes permanently stained.
once it is complete the verse it self is explained."
to
it drys and then becomes permanently stained.
once it's complete the verse is self explained

ex. 2

"be glad that we are blessed with skill to be bold.
like i was once told, the ink in the pen is wut is really made of gold."
to
be glad that we're blessed with the skill to be bold.
like i was once told, the ink in the pen is truly gold.

You can find it in a few other places too... rewording is key.

Nice drop,..

__________________
Was he robbed of the ashphalt that cushioned his face?

alright thankz for the feed. alot of people at my skool liked this piece so i was glad to make another verse. and im sure ill do many more for it. until then check out me against the world vol 1 and II. and a long bridge to cross. cus those are my emotions at the moment lol

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

This was a decent drop i would have to say one of the best ive seen from you ..you had a very creative topic and you took a very creative point of view on this..your feelign and emotions werent quit on par as i would have expected it to be ..but overall this was a pretty nice drop..only think that could have been better was your vocab and wordplay usuage..you could reword your bars and make them sound alot better... keep it up elevate.

__________________

uppin this shit... good shit..... yep yep.... *passes the shit*

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

Showin Much Respect For Droppin Feed On My Shit, At First Glance This Piece Is Just Aight...but If You Really Analyze It The Talent Shows, It Took Creativity To Strech The Subject Out And Make It As Long As It Is, Most Of The Time One Subject Dragged Out Would Get Boring And Played Out As It Goes On But You Made It Work. Only Thing I Can Nit Pick At Is You Rhymed "gold, Told, & Unfold" Alot. Still A Nice Joint Though.

__________________

word. i did this in 2 sittings so i kinda forgot... anyways this piece is hella old and i just refreshed a lil bit of it.. thanks for the feed fam.

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

uppin ppl dont slep on this

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

uppin this piece

__________________
im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.