Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
02-12-04, 09:02 PM | #1 | ||||
Light Weight
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Some.....
IP: 9CA0 C805
Sometimes I sit in the room and think to myself...
Sometimes it seems like I just sink into hell.. Someday, I'ma get the payback for what's been lost.. The love I once felt at the foot of the cross... Some people seem to think that life is all beautiful... But some of us only see the world as a funeral.. You're born, and then you'll live if you're lucky... Afterwards u die...feel the angels or demons touching... Somewhere, there's someone with this exact thought.. With an automatic weapon, tellin' people to back off... Sometimes, I wonder if I even have a destiny... Cuz sometimes it seems it's just to rest in peace... <--- mind is blank...I'll finish this one day maybe..who knows? lol...
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<center> I.J.L</center> |
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02-15-04, 09:01 PM | #2 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: 2A8C 115D
yo fam srry to see this being slept on an glad to see u delvin in poetry...its really not much dif from most rap stylez...
i thin that this is missin somethin an if u eva get it together u should finish this cuz i love the path its goin down... i thought the way u used ur rhyme sparingly showed that u already kno was good an didnt turn it to a rap with excess of rhyme... hope to see the end of this some day man
__________________
~â€-LiBeRaTe Me!â€-~
CuZ Im PoEtIcAlLy UnStOpPaBlE
Read My Shit & Gimme Respect
I.J.L. Liberating All From Whack Ass Rhymes
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02-17-04, 02:32 AM | #3 | ||||||
Light Weight
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IP: 640C 3FBD
This reminds me of some song by Mos Def I was listening to on the way home from work just a minute ago. Not because of the content or anything. Just cause of how you were starting it with "Sometimes" a lot.
Anyways, it wasn't bad. I wasn't really following the story or whatever though. Kinda jumped around. Looks like you were just in a bad mood and started writing what came into your head. That's how it happens sometimes. Keep writing and posting them up. |
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