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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
09-27-04, 07:24 PM
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#1
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Blow Me
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One Last Kiss
IP: 7D7A FF3D
First Attempt at poetry.. From day one i always knew that love was my main purpose.. and i have been doing just that since i have been walkin the earths surface now we are holding hands palms sweaty she knows im nervous.. but i gotta tell her the truth theres no way she deserves this... so i hold her tight.. whisper in her ear.. that something just not right.. contemplating suicide.. and if she doesnt leave i will be taking her life... she said " no this can't be" and thats when i took out that knife.. three thrusts to the breast... their goes.. my future wife... as i look at my bloody hands i wonder whyit had to be like this.. our love was so warm and tender.. thats something i will miss... she didnt believe me... and got in the way of danger took the risk.. so i lean towards her bloody body.. and give my pregnant fiance... One Last Kiss....
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My Lines Are ILL yo |
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09-27-04, 09:06 PM
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#2
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<<-Carpe Noctum->>
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IP: 3240 794D
wow, damn homey, this was a good drop, a little eery, but well written for your first poem, keep em comin, i'm intrigued....pc
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"QUOD ME NUTRIT, ME DESTRUIT--AUT VINCERE AUT MORI" O Y D   *FluidMusic* *Poetic Scriptures Moderator* |
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09-27-04, 09:11 PM
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#3
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Blow Me
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IP: 7D7A FF3D
lmao yeah i realized once i read it over that it was a little weird.. lmao im gonna stick with this poetry stuff..
keep the feed coming
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My Lines Are ILL yo |
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09-27-04, 09:43 PM
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#4
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My Dick Stay Wet
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IP: 28AD 5545
damn...returnin da feedback to ya....some nice shit right hurr....big upps......
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09-28-04, 05:22 PM
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#5
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Blow Me
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IP: 7D7A FF3D
uppin for feed..
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My Lines Are ILL yo |
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09-28-04, 05:50 PM
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#6
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who wants a hug????
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IP: 37C2 3ABD
holy shit homie, that shit is tight, makes me like think aobut taht shit and stuff..... nice drop///
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09-28-04, 11:19 PM
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#7
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A Reflection Of The Past
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IP: F21F 37B6
you this however was a half decent poem man...better from the father figure poem.this is actually a poem lol...it had imagery,emotion as well as the thought put into this peace.....nice job man keep at it
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Crhyme Sindicate
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09-29-04, 12:08 PM
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#8
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New to RB
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IP: 9253 500F
oh shit man wasnt expectin it to take that turn in the middle but hey it was really good so keep it up aight lata playa
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   waddup gangsta!?!?! R.I.P. Isaiah Ryder 7/11/82 - 2/26/04 tell all my people i'm a Ridah nobody cries when we die we outlaws let me ride until I get free I live my life in tha fast lane got police chasen me-Tupac |
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09-29-04, 01:47 PM
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#9
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IP: 28AD 5545
this is ur first poem, but it's written well, very nice and good concept..... this ya girl fiya..
best lines: so i hold her tight.. whisper in her ear.. that something just not right.. contemplating suicide.. and if she doesnt leave i will be taking her life... she said " no this can't be" and thats when i took out that knife.. three thrusts to the breast... their goes.. my future wife... ^really nicely put..^
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09-29-04, 02:04 PM
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#10
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GoD LiKe
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IP: A23B D5BB
Dope
Loved The Whole Murder Scene Keep Droppin This Eery Ass Poetry On The Murda Tip Loved It
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I am Here To Save You All    
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