|
|
|
|
| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
11-23-04, 02:42 PM
|
#1
|
||||
|
L.E
|
Abandoned
IP: 87C5 5C3A
[Verse 1] I'ma go smoke some...you think this is a joke, son? My mutilation is way beyond meer purification... In these days...we need more than loving waves Some aren't brave...and they all end up in thier graves... You just don't know the pain...what is my name..? It goes way beyond pleading that I'm fuckin' insane... I thought I was loved...well I don't know if it's done But the way I'm shunned, enough to make a fool outta anyone... The story is...fuck, I'm still just mourning this... My girl Jenn is cheating on me wit Jordan watta whore she is... No...dismiss those thoughts...my temper is just hot... But what happened to the love I thought that couldn't be bought..? [Chorus] My decison...what good is it..? I'm abandoned and my pain is exquisit... My love...what good has it been..? I'm abaondoned...will I ever feel love again..? [Verse 2] I ask my mom...if she would strive for happiness... No matter the circumstances...romantic dances... Somebody to hold...somebody who would alwasy understand... Holdin' hands...I guess I was just in a no-man's land... I get so pissed...but it was such a perfect gift... I raise my fist...and I weep...when I remember and reminice... I pray to God everynight...and I beg him for it to remain... My soul is trapped, my self-esteem, all's that's left is a grain... I talk to her on the phone...I just don't sense her love anymore... If there was a way to go back, I would take any and every door... [Chorus] My decison...what good is it..? I'm abandoned and my pain is exquisit... My love...what good has it been..? I'm abaondoned...will I ever feel love again..? [Verse 3] My end is near...I can sense it, smell the fear... I pray one last time before I slit my neck ear to ear... If there's one thing to learn from me...don't be fated... Don't make pain hated, because dreams are over-rated... It's time to commit suicide...how many more youths will die? I have lossed all hope...well I guess this is my stupid side... But before you criticize, put yourself in my eyes, in my shoes... Cause when somethin' is perfect...it's almost always too good be true... [Chorus] My decison...what good is it..? I'm abandoned and my pain is exquisit... My love...what good has it been..? I'm abaondoned...will I ever feel love again..? ...Waiting for feedback...I will return the favor... |
||||
 
|
|
|
11-23-04, 02:45 PM
|
#2
|
||||||||
|
Geaux Fuck Yourself
|
IP: 9A07 1297
I was feelin' it... I really hadn't read much of your stuff before and I was pretty impressed man keep up...
8.75/10
__________________
King of Missouri I Fucked Mack's Mom. And I Liked It. -[p-S-a]- 2003-2009 Quote:
|
||||||||
|
|
|
11-23-04, 11:29 PM
|
#3
|
||||
|
L.E
|
IP: 826C 4C70
A'ight thanks uppin' for some feed...I will return favors.
|
||||
|
|
|
|
11-23-04, 11:32 PM
|
#4
|
||||
|
IP: 3240 794D
yo you talented nigga..
when I was anewb I thought you was the best when you had the other eminm avy..like the rapperz you still tight nigz..give it a 8.9/10 Dont give 9's out that much..just cuz I hate on people.. GJ---
__________________
The Competition
 |
||||
|
|
|
|
11-24-04, 12:01 AM
|
#5
|
|||||
|
Banned: Cheating
|
IP: 5043 32F4
this is a good one...8/10...very good...emotional stucture good to a point...very good vocab and flowed well...to hard to choose these topicals of the month
|
|||||
|
|
|
|
11-24-04, 12:03 AM
|
#6
|
||||
|
L.E
|
IP: 826C 4C70
Thanks...uppin' for some more feed...I'll hit you and Indeph wit PM's about our collab...
|
||||
|
|
|
|
11-24-04, 12:46 AM
|
#7
|
|||||||
|
G.Y.T.
|
IP: 4185 68F3
wow, this is a very good O.M., you came hott as usuall, i liked how u explained his life and why he had to end it, i think alot of ppl could relate to this. This is a well thought out verse as i could very easily tell by the emotion. The best line to me is....
But before you criticize, put yourself in my eyes, in my shoes... Cause when somethin' is perfect...it's almost always too good be true... that was a very smart bar... much props.. 9.1/10
__________________
|
|||||||
|
|
|
11-24-04, 12:15 PM
|
#8
|
||||
|
L.E
|
IP: 87C5 5C3A
Thanks...uppin'for more feedback...favors will be returned...
|
||||
|
|
|
|
12-08-04, 09:29 PM
|
#9
|
||||
|
L.E
|
IP: 03A1 A28A
Uppin' for some more feed on this....
|
||||
|
|
|
 |
| Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
| Display Modes | |
|
|
Linear Mode
