RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 04-01-03, 11:16 AM   #1
DaviD WoRdplay
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
Exclamation :: A Soldier's Thoughts ::

IP: 37E4 FCDC

This is an account of a soldier's last thoughts.....

The countdown has begun, there’s no time to be wasted
When will they face it? War’s the only option, there are no replacements
You can’t escape it; all you can do is turn to God like Mase did
We fight for freedom, the one element greater than anything touched or tasted
So empty your suitcases, we’re gonna make this one for the ages
Saddam, I speak the name with hatred, enough to burn through my rhyme books pages
We conquer in stages, step by step to take back the country for its people
Studying their movements, their brains are transparent and easy to see through
They study me too, The American solider, most invincible and dangerous unit in war
No More bullshit, it’s time for Saddam’s regime to end and be no more
Terror strikes their bodies to the core, half their army is ready to surrender
The chaos is like placing the troops, tanks, and bombs in a blender
My thoughts are rendered; these faggots lied about everything they said
Make their fuckin’ turbans looks like their insides, bloodshot red
Many face their deathbed, projectile rockets of hot lead flying past my head
Instead of duckin’ and runnin’, we say fuck em and gun em until extinction
We all look the same when we’re dead, no need for distinction
My mind’s blinkin’; I know you’re thinkin’, how can a mind blink?
It’s when your mind Sinks in and out of consciousness and you can’t think
A distinct stick, it’s the essence of the rotting dead corpses
The sights morbid, the obscene scene of deceased Iraqi forces
A desert fortress, a place where the desert winds always whistle
Bombs and missiles, heard the footsteps, turned to look down the barrel of a pistol
Within a second, a spark propelled the fatal bullet from the weapon
I never reckoned, that I’d die by the hand of an Iraqi peasant
A death present, I was told to watch my back, I guess I learned my lesson
  Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-03, 11:05 AM   #2
DaviD WoRdplay
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 37E4 FCDC

Uppin...

someone hit the snooze button?
  Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-03, 11:07 AM   #3
BlUnT-MC
Got More Meds Than Pfizer
 
BlUnT-MC's Avatar
 
Posts: 2,637
Joined: Nov 2002
From: ScarBorouGh
Status: Offline
Text Record: 25-38
Audio Record: 11-10
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 144A ADA4

not bad... the flow could use some work but the content and vocab are on point.. topic was constant, couldn't really tell it was a soldier story, but in some places you could... uppin'
__________________
Authentik Intelligence
Send a message via AIM to BlUnT-MC   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-03, 11:11 AM   #4
DaviD WoRdplay
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 37E4 FCDC

thanks for the reply....
  Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-03, 12:07 PM   #5
Kapone
BANNED - Pink Slipped
 
Kapone's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,205
Joined: Mar 2003
From: Being "investigated" fuckin ban me, u fuckin narcs
Status: Offline
Text Record: 11-6
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 3648 3028

blunt mc didnt tap it hard enuff, the flow was consistent wit the vocab, but when you use multies your lines haveta be shorter. yaknow i meen that multies make ur line longer so you gotta moniter the sylable count, 13-16 sylables a line, mine are longer its my style,

good drop, decent scheme and idealism,
Send a message via Yahoo to Kapone   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-03, 12:09 PM   #6
DaviD WoRdplay
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 37E4 FCDC

thanks for the feedback, I'll work on that
  Reply With Quote
Old 04-04-03, 08:23 PM   #7
Domain 9
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 4577 CD9A

Scarface hit this pretty good with his topic. Everything was pretty much in running order on this piece but minor work could be made to improve this and tweek and tune it to make it better. Line length affects the flow as he said so yea, watch you syllable count. This was a nice piece and I was really feeling the topic since it is going right along with current events... good drop.

pz
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-08-03, 04:09 PM   #8
younggadget
wanna be sek-c
 
Posts: 695
Joined: Apr 2003
From: Merkin Knightshade in checkers on MSN
Status: Offline
Text Record: 12-9
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 28E1 9280

IT WAS GOOD.RAPPING ABOUT THE WAR. ALOT OF PEOPLE CANT DO THAT WITHOUT WANDERING TO ANOTHER TOPIC.
Send a message via AIM to younggadget Send a message via Yahoo to younggadget   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:39 AM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.