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06-22-03, 12:58 AM | #1 | ||||||
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Dreams
IP: A476 6362
aiight i havent posted in a while so i quickly created this.
How many people like me do ya see/| White and busting their rap on mtv?| craving fame but none know their name/ being put down they smuggle their shame/ as the spit in the underground Waiting to be found/ becoming a hound/ as they put forth everything they've got/ put on the spot but there everything their not/ expected to be and their dreams break free but they go home shattered / Their dreams have been splattered/ On the pavement of hope/ So they turn to dope hoping to scope/ Out their problems with coke/ Till the OD on a drug called codeine/ And end up dead cremated instead/ And their remains scattered just like their dreams that were shattered. Uppin for feedback and please just dont diss it. Give some advice |
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06-22-03, 01:01 AM | #2 | ||||||
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IP: A476 6362
It had an aight flow the content of it was decent. Some things really didnt rhyme exmaple:
Out their problems with coke/ Till the OD on a drug called codeine/ And end up dead cremated instead/ But ya getting there with ya works, you slowly grow some. |
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06-22-03, 01:02 AM | #3 | |||||||
BANNED For Being A Dick
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IP: 7F51 D5BC
Had some god stuff
in it but it ended weak You need to work at it |
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06-22-03, 01:18 AM | #4 | ||||||
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IP: A033 F1A0
FUCKIN MEX GET AT OUR BATTLE U STILL HAVENT POSTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
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06-22-03, 01:20 AM | #5 | ||||||
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IP: A033 F1A0
O SHIT!
dark lord i got mad props fo u ive seen yea shit u mad good |
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06-22-03, 01:43 AM | #6 | ||||||
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IP: D27D 0B18
most of your verse was nice, but R.x was right about the stuff that didnt really rhyme, the rest was nice though
peace~~~ |
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06-22-03, 02:38 AM | #7 | ||||||
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IP: A476 6362
^^^ thanks ill make sure to watch that in the future. Uppin. Got 19 views 5 replys. Yall are sleeping
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