God tapped me on my right shoulder
handed me the right to fight as his soldier
sun rose from the west thrice, nights were colder
the conclusion, no more living illusions
under the human plan, time for sacrifice
envision beduans fighting with rusty knives
didn't listen
the radiation of nuclear light had my atoms splittin
couldn't phathom the atmosphere had risen
but still i was sent on this mission with no percision
no skill
knew i was too fake just to kill
couldn't take it
looked down at the ground to see that i was fully naked
speechless to the fact that other people were faceless
six billion dead to be raceless
couldn't explain it with mathematics
soul spew outta my temple franctic
heathens punished for breathing Satanic treason
my heart stop beatin
no more decieving myself
got sunked outta this piece of shit at the speed of 10 stealthes
saw the land masses melt away all classes
the final clash protrayed the great Allah wrathes
remenents of carcasses
could this be the end of the Narcicyst
so which one of the seven levels
judges wanna burn in hell with the Devil
couldn't say a word
realized i was just another sheep from the herd
didn't qualify the sentence, must have chose the wrong verb
bynging, crynging to feel my sin synging
woke up in a cold sweat to hear my phone ringin
weakened, half alive like i was paralyized as a host
staring at this burn mark on my arm, shape of a bar code

this was hott...i read right through this...man ya flow was on point..somma ya vocab was a lil twisted wit ya sentence structure...but ya wordplay picked somma that up...
not bad man nig...not bad at all...

holla

one...hunnet

__________________
freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

good lookin out guys...i'm not into poetry that much but i'm startin to get there though...actually this poem is in two parts maybe later i will post up the second...anyways thanks for the positive feedback...one

this was most definetly raw with imagery n strong vocab (even though at times i felt you did over elaborate with the more complex vocab, but then again, that may just be the way the piecce was....but the inconsistency in some parts may say different...but it's all good..)...

..anyway, brilliant the way you built it up....and ended it on a very chilling and twisted end...first i thought it was something to do with the Jews in the aftermath of Nazi Germany concentration camps, you know, so ill now in an allied hospital, paralyzed with fear, fear being the parasite or something like that...

...but the reference of Allah threw me off that perception of this piece...but i got a couple other more personal and weird perceptions out of it...

..it seemed to have a certain amount of persdonal depth to it for sure...what was it about from your 'eyes'? Whati mean is, what were you writing about exactly, from your point of view....?....

you see i am originally Iraqi...did you know that it is manadotry that an Iraqi male the age of 18 has to join the military for 5 years...basically this poem is about the Apacolypse, and how none of us are ready for it...that and it's anti-government in a way...hope i answered your question if not just i dont know reply again and i will try to give you a better answer...good lookin out..one

LONG LIVE IRAQ AND THE TALENT IT PRODUCES