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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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Guest
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im going
IP: D884 6ACA
Realistically I know im not going 2 die instantly/
I understand depression will sadistically/ Dissect me clinically over many years 2specifically/ Torture me and so this knife I hold does symbolise/ The end 2all my cries and now I realise/ Love nor money will conquer me and so/ Ive decided its time 4 me 2 go allow my sprit 2 flow/ Before it 2 is corrupt but by meeting the end/ My very soul may indeed descend/ In2 hell but oh well I couldn’t complain/ Id rather go there than continue 2 feel this pain/ |
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BANNED By Jae Cyph
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IP: FB8A C72F
not bad
Varentao: If i see any more from you. You will most probably be banned. Last edited by varentao : 07-21-03 at 09:35 PM. |
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Str8 From CopKilla Queens
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IP: 399E F0FD
i really dig this shit man it had good vocab in the beggining but it was a little too simple to have the vocab i dont know it was good though dont get me wrong its just that in the slightest way it seemed off balance but u mos def get respect, also can u check out my poem it means a lot to me, 1luv.
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Guest
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IP: 84B7 08E9
A well enough compressed piece of emotions. Blunt with an overall simplicity.
Rhyme scene a bit rigid, but then i felt that was one of the things that made the piece what it was. Er, very good for what it was. I actually remember you from way back i think. Your name thingy looks familiar. ..resp... |
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Guest
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IP: 399E F0FD
I thought it was pretty good...
peAce |
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Guest
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IP: A86A 770C
Quote:
yeah from what i can remember i was here b4 u |
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Tampons are expensive
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IP: EF0A E7B2
hmmm...interesting but the fact that there aint too much in it made the whole piece sort of hanging on a thread. Its like lacking something that i mostly look for in writing but for some reason i cant tell you what it is because i know u have it inside and u just gotta familiarize with it and use it.
This is not bad at all. The simplicity made this piece understandable. keep it up!
__________________
<br><br><center>- Shiznit - - Tampons are still expensive - - That's a Fact - </center> |
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Guest
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IP: 84B7 08E9
Quote:
You probably were. Once again, nice enough piece. |
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Guest
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IP: 7D5E D3FA
HEY!!!!! its my guy!!!! HEY i'm mad at you, why don't you "im" me anymore?!?!? I should beat you up so bad!!!! Hmm..I guess i'll let you get by this just one time. I liked this piece because it displayed your emotions....but i'm upset that your still feeling this way...hmm....i wont make you sleep on the couch anymore..if that helps..(if you even remember that joke..lol)
Kid you know I love you....Just email me if you need somethign Babyblues20042002@yahoo.com Glad to see your backk...I MISSED YOU!! |
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Guest
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IP: D251 FCF5
nice drop but it needed more complexity it was missin sometin the vocab n stucture was ther but it jus neede more in it
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