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Old 11-23-03, 02:31 PM   #1
FanTa ZeE
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~In The Event Of My Demise~

IP: E31C 355F

In this life i have accomplished next to nothing, Lord knows its way before my time,
And if i were to be stolen away tomorrow, would i even be remembered for my rhymes?
How long would the world grieve me? Would my dying wishes be known?
Would they see beyond the outer shell? Would they miss me when i was gone?
My defiance brought me enemies, which in turn, brought me fatal regret,
In fifeteen years, i never strayed from my roots, surely it can't be near the end yet?
Will i live to see my dreams fulfilled, will i die before i fall in love?
And if the reeper came for me in the morning, would he take me below or above?
Is my soul that of angelic qualities? is my blood all pure and good?
Or do i represent a being of Satan? Living life as i did in the hood.
Would my achievements mean a thing to those i grew up beside?
Have all these awful tears been worth it? Had i recognised the lies?
Would i die alone, in my miserable solitude, surrounded with nothing but failure,
Or would i struggle till my last breath, in the warmness of my culture?
Will i become a slave to nature? or will the winds of time turn me around?
If i was kidnapped before my death, would my fragile body be found?
Would they notice that i wasn't there, when they were laughing amongst themselves?
Would they cry onto the lid of my casket, as the undertaker delves?
Would i be remembered for my personality, my humour, or my wit?
Times I've came close to letting go, but an angel told me it wasn't worth it.
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Old 11-23-03, 02:39 PM   #2
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this was a nice piece, real emotional
the last line really took it away
it hits close to home, i am close friends with some
that feel the same
very nice drop right here
keep it up
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Old 11-23-03, 11:35 PM   #3
The Necromancer
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Hm... I liked this. On a technical level, the lines were long, possibly too long. And at times the rhymes and even flow seemed slightly forced. But aside from that, it's good.

As for the content... well... I don't know how someone can't relate to it. I can relate to it, LadySage can relate to it, everyone else should too. We all want to be remembered in some way, we all want to know where we go when we die, and we all want to know how it is we're going to die.

Much respect for being able to express it too. I've tried writing peices like this, but they all end up like shit. This certainly aint shit.

~Irenic~
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Old 11-24-03, 09:07 AM   #4
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When i read this you had me asking questions myself. The words fit and structure was fine. There was emotion, that of curiosity wanting to know what the future holds. Some stuff we weren't meant to know but other stuff is. Great drop hun keep it up. Much Love, JT
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Old 11-24-03, 10:30 AM   #5
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everyone said everything

nuf said...
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Old 11-24-03, 02:46 PM   #6
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Good piece. It leaves a person think about what their life is actually about. The reason on which we were put here and if we will go to heaven or hell. Kind of like a timeline thing. I liked this. It has many questions in which I have asked myself. Makes me think about a lot of stuff. Thanks for the reminder. Overall, everything was nice on it. Overall, good job. Keep droppin. Much respect.
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Old 11-24-03, 11:25 PM   #7
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Nice piece. At first i noticed the title...

~In The Event Of My Demise~

And i thought o shit she better not have jacked the 2pac poem but you didnt

ok back to this. Really liked this lot of emotion and i could relate alot to this. Really thought it was good. Respect and props.

Overall Grade:

8/10
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