young mike livin the struggle//

smokin weed,skippin school got me in trouble//

probation extended rapsheet dubled and tripled//

you dont know what its like to beat a man that cripled//

just to get a little change a little money//

this shit real aint nothin funny//

so i went to the store//

i was equiped with the fourtyfour//

next thing ya on the floor//

with cops rushin through the door//

when the judge said im facein 5 years i was shook//

thats the every day life of a crook//

thats when i decided to stop//

a month later the charges were droped//

that was a very cliched story. i can prolly guarantee that you haven't done any of the shit you claimin in dem verses.
anyways, not much effect in your structure, and like i said, really cliched. try rappin bout shit that you KNOW about. shit you been through, and shit that might be different from the average shmo...
keep elevatin...one

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...threadid=101780

soz. peep this if you'se can...

This is your 3rd open mic today...none had links get the links for your other one that I didn't close, then PM me other links and maybe I will re-open this for you...but this is Closed.