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01-02-04, 01:14 PM | #1 | ||
New to RB
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..Alcoholic..
IP:
Stuck, Im Trying to Be Drunk so Droppa Buck.. Yell at the Sky, Just so My Shit-Talk is-Up..Fuck My Clover's Outta Luck. Choice to Drink-Or-Not Fam Or Brew. Tell Me What Kinda Man Are You? With-Drawin Puke-in cant Live Wittout a Can-or-2 Beatin-ya Wife what I'm Speakin is Right, I Might.. Have Got you Finally Thinkin Tonight. But i Might cause you To Drink-More While you Think More.. A women Who Loves Brew. Men Think - Whore.. Group Homes and Jail For a Human Addiction, Listen alcohoism is Sickinin. But I'm Stuck. Did i Mention?. drop some Honest Feed-Back. This was A key-Style Open Mic
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01-02-04, 02:16 PM | #2 | ||
Word.
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IP:
You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get closed, Thanks.
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01-02-04, 02:30 PM | #3 | ||
Drop Of Genius
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IP:
This was pretty good.
Vocab and flow was good throughout the peice and 99% of the structure was spot on. I'd improve it by tryin to relate with alcoholics more Overall good drop 8/10 |
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01-02-04, 02:59 PM | #4 | |
Guest
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IP:
it was a good piece. i think it was kind of simple, but the topic was really good. a lot of people can relate to this. sturcture was off the hook. keep writing.
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01-02-04, 03:13 PM | #5 | |||
New to RB
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IP:
Quote:
My Feed-Back’s : Tha Shadow.. http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthr...threadid=102983 Too Easy..http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthr...threadid=103078 SkiddZ..http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthr...threadid=101649 Uppin For My Verse... Where's My drinkaz At?..
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01-02-04, 03:46 PM | #6 | ||
New to RB
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IP:
I thought this peice was ok it needs to be longer though that was only like 10 or 8 lines or sumthin ............. keep freestylin,.
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"The Legion" takes no prisoners! I can be nice but dont make me mad....cause when I loose control.......your dead !! my site: http://freestyleman.proboards25.com/index.cgi |
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01-02-04, 09:38 PM | #7 | |
Guest
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IP:
this was cool, should of been longer..but it's still nice...topic was cool structure was nice, so the flow went well..
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01-03-04, 05:57 AM | #8 | |
Guest
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IP:
good freestyle but how about adding more lines and thought..flow was spot on and structure was ok..
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01-03-04, 10:37 AM | #9 | ||
1E
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IP:
yeah i quite liked this...good key...the title put me off a bit..bit played...but took a good slant at it...nicely structured for most...flow seemed good.....not bad..nice....pZ
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02-18-04, 02:36 AM | #10 | ||
New to RB
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IP:
upping this Old shit. Want Feed.
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02-18-04, 02:47 AM | #11 | |
Guest
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IP:
good job on this. the flow was good, the word use was good and
so was the style considering it was unique. however there were times I had to re-read the lines because they confused me and some still do. but then again poetry is vast and it can be written in any way, shape, and form and author pleases so anyway. good drop. hit mines up in return please. |
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