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Old 10-05-04, 05:47 PM   #1
night crawler
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Post stop the violence

IP:

we need to come up with some sort of ceasefire.
If it was an East Coast/West Coast or not
too many soljas on tha street gettin shot
we need to put a stop to this before it gets out of hand
stop this shit for your childrens furure try to understand
put away dem gats , that shit is for dirty rats
muhfuckerz from the gutter who be usin dem baseballbats
dont start killin the streetz , walk straight on your feet
follow the right path , give space for our children to breathe
nomore violence its guidin u straight to your grave
it aint bout surviving anymore , its bout being weak or be brave
we keepin the youngsta's inside
in times like this its just better to hide
playgrounds turned into battlegrounds
imagin for yaself how a gunshot sounds
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Old 10-06-04, 11:22 AM   #2
night crawler
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IP:

UPPING ....................
yo wake up
read and drop sum feedback
i'll return the fav
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Old 10-06-04, 03:43 PM   #3
night crawler
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wake up
still upping...... comon y'all
drop sum feedback
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Old 10-06-04, 03:46 PM   #4
Klassic
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i wasnt feeling it, maybe cuz its too short and shit. Try to work out ur strucuture a bit better over all its aight, use some more vocab.
No hate feed on my Open Mics
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Old 10-06-04, 05:08 PM   #5
Premanition
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From: Uk
IP:

this was alrite man, but you still need to elevate quite alot but that will come wiv time n frequently droppin verses....ya flow was o.k n ya structure was gud to me but ya need to up ya vocab n try to bring abit more wordplay into ya verses, emotion was gud but cud still be upped....o.k im giv this..

6.5/10

keep elevatin n droppin...props

hit this up
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=153781
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Old 10-06-04, 08:05 PM   #6
Klassic
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IP:

if u say ull return the fav then do
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