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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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Flyweight
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freestlye mah final words
IP:
yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death prayin on me to make one fatal mistake drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz dont let them get me paranuyde off weed unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha day we pass on
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Gods Of War! -yeah im one
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IP:
Mad verse, came straight from the heart. Emotion is strong.
Damn peeps should be ashamed of themselves not giving feedback.
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Gods Of War! -yeah im one
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IP:
Why is it people view it but cant drop a couple lines??
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Whys That?
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IP:
ok drop, sounded a bit tupac'ish..blah
You need to type better vocab, seen as this is a text peice.you should write your word's properly, I struggled to read thru this drop because of the way you wrote it. This also could be the reason why people have veiwed it and not replied, because it isnt easy on the eye's to read. keep dropping keep elevating |
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Flyweight
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IP:
thankz playa for tha feed back thas how i do all mah frees
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Hates Fucking Idiots
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IP:
yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death prayin on me to make one fatal mistake drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz dont let them get me paranuyde off weed unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha day we pass on This wasn't very good there was hardly any rhymes the flow was basic structure unstable punches lacked...perhaps some emotion but it seemed like you were just speaking...3.5/10 you need to up that layout and add more rhymes...RTF on my open mic plz...
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List of people who've Ducked Me: KnightShade mAtW Bizzy |
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Flyweight
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IP:
Quote:
Quote:
damm it aint no battle it dont need punchs i aint dissin any it was jus a free tha top of mah head next time i wont post any thing damm but thankx for tha feed back aight ill check your shit out let me critsize your shit see how you like it it was only a free didnt realy wont feed back but if you didnt like it why give feed back cat allwayz wonna bring me down well fuck all yall an by tha way ahm disslexic if you didnt notice thas why mah spellin aint to good but i try but ye smash me down its aight
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***cITYSLICka***
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IP:
yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death prayin on me to make one fatal mistake drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz dont let them get me paranuyde off weed unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha day we pass on work on ur spelling.i forced my self to finish reading this piece.spelling is discouraging. ur rhyme scheme needs improvement.first line doesn't fit in at all. emotion was there and after reading this twice i kinda get how u want me to see it. if u want feed bak fix it up.make it easier to read.nobody wants to struggle to read.
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![]() ![]() I'm like CHUCKy dyin' to live in the flesh free of the BATTERY, ASSAULT n ROBBERY rapidly,wishin' cupid would clap at me N lift this evil spell so I can experience happilly evil backwards-see(down there) EVIL............backwards =............LIVE |
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