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Old 12-12-04, 12:34 PM   #1
Speats
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Father Please...

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iight heres a inner battle topic i used agains WickedClown...and im inpress by myself...here it is


Doctor's told that he only had 5 minutes to live,nothing to panic...
Maybe they could save him,my first time seing something tragic...
I heard some screems in room 27,still remember the number...
My dad passed away when i was eleven,i lost a family member...
Till then,here i go thinking of him again,still tears to my eyes...
my mom came to the house with new step-father...i wasint surprised...
she thaught it would'nt bother,but it did,so we hated each-other...
now today,i went to see his grave,told him how we behaved...
and that without him....i was feeling like a slave....i wished to see you again...
but for now...daddy...i will always remember you...never forget me...
as someone who helped me,i wanna tell you....rest in peace...
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Old 12-12-04, 12:55 PM   #2
SR$
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From: Detroit, MI (tha Murda Mitten)
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damn, dat shit is cold as hell. i gives it a 8.5/10. dats hot. check out my thread..."STRAIGHT FOOLIN!!!". i would put a link on here but i dont know how to so check it out when you get a chance. ~1~
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Old 12-12-04, 12:58 PM   #3
GKillaz05
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yo, that shit was sick Spitty, you are gettin better kid. Just keep at it, I rate this about 7.5/10.
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Old 12-12-04, 01:02 PM   #4
Speats
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damn thanks...uppin this...my first timwe having a good rate like this lol
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Old 12-12-04, 01:41 PM   #5
MADDRAPPER
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content I'll give you a straight ten but the rhyming I can only give you a three because you rushed into this and didn't capture the true feeling of sadness
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Old 12-12-04, 09:53 PM   #6
Speats
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upppin this...thanks for the feedback yall
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Old 12-12-04, 09:55 PM   #7
nucleuss
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hot as fuck datz sum deep shit right here
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Old 12-12-04, 10:23 PM   #8
Speats
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thanks alot....uppinn
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Old 12-12-04, 11:03 PM   #9
Speats
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feedback please
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Old 12-13-04, 07:42 AM   #10
Speats
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.......................
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Old 12-13-04, 05:05 PM   #11
Speats
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uppin please....leave links so i could give you feedback too
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Old 12-13-04, 06:30 PM   #12
Speats
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Up-in Plea-se...
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Old 12-13-04, 07:43 PM   #13
Speats
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.........................
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Old 12-14-04, 07:33 AM   #14
Speats
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uppin one more time
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Old 12-14-04, 08:03 AM   #15
The Militant
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man i was taken back by that u got some good shit dwag u got deep emotions.
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