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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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07-14-05, 12:54 PM
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#1
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+...Femin-iLL...+
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.In Tears.
IP:
In Tears
*Each Tear Holds A Story ..........Please Baby!...Dont Hit Me!.. ..........Its's 2AM...My God, Where Is He?.. ..........Why Doesn't He See The Person Within Me *Each Story Shows Naivety ..........I Have To Remeber He Has A Short Temper.. ..........He Went To Visit His Mother, Maybe He's With Her.. ..........Maybe He'll Lyke Me If I Was A Little Thinner.. *Each Act Of Naivety Brings Reality ..........Mrs. Jenkins Called The Police..They Issued A Restraining Order.. ..........He Took My Pay Check...Something About Being A Child Supporter.. ..........The People At The Hospitol Told Me I Have An Eating Disorder.. *Each Spirt Of Reality Releases The Truth ..........I want To Die.. ..........I want To Die.. ..........Why Don't I Just Die?.. In Tears
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..:: Artik In The Phlesh::.. .Re-Writing The Re-Run.  |
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07-15-05, 07:06 AM
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#2
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Odi et Amo
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IP:
Girl, do me a favor! Next time pleasssssse make it longer because this had nice potential but I would've liked to see more details ya kno. Had a good amount of emotion, nice storyline, good imagery but please make it longer next time! I like the concept as well, nice nice...
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Authentik Intelligence  ...The future is mine... |
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07-15-05, 07:48 AM
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#3
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Poet's Daughter.
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IP:
True. Nice drop here, got that emotion in there. Imagery is goodie, like DQ said you got potential and I wished it would be longer. Vocab is a must to be upp. ^^ I dont know what DQ ment by story-line cause there aint none, lol. But Nice I liked this drop, next time make it longer...Peace.
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mystery Is a Freak!! ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life. Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8 ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do. Smartone Freal:  ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u Smartone Freal: ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged* |
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07-15-05, 12:07 PM
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#4
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+...Femin-iLL...+
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IP:
thanx...yeah, i didnt get too into writing this...cuz i wrote it for my buddy's class assignment...and she told me not to go off on the deep end....but i appreciated it...
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..:: Artik In The Phlesh::.. .Re-Writing The Re-Run. |
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07-21-05, 01:56 PM
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#5
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+...Femin-iLL...+
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IP:
bumpity bumps.....
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..:: Artik In The Phlesh::.. .Re-Writing The Re-Run. |
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