its impossible to comprehend the human mind, if u try
u jus find, another barrier standin in ur way to get by
people give it a shot, give it a go but have no luck
so stuck, they trynna feel they way in wit no touch
and aint it amazing, we eatin our bread without tasting
without savouring every moment and every gift that our fate brings
and we can say things, but we all know that we dont really mean it
how can we begrudge people we aint even meet yet
it seems to get worse with every verse thats been dropped
ima be the first to tell u that im the first one who stopped
why we beefin? trynna teach each other some lessons?
man, we all hip hop here, we dont need to be schooled in the essence
i kno u feel ur tha best, dude, we all feel that too
but if u feel that ur the greatest, then we all feel for you
a man's greatest down fall will be his greatest achievement
u dont wanna be remembered by the way u achieved it


(maybe not the best way to put this in writing, but whoever answers negatively to this, is exactly the person im talking about)

__________________

????????????????

__________________

uhmm, you need 2 links of feedback if you want this to stay open

__________________

i dun see people giving me feedback, so why should i give them some?

__________________

how bout you read the rules, and that's the way it goes. if any post after this does not include 2 links for feedback, this will be closed

__________________

then i guess its closed.................

__________________

how hard is it to leave links? thats the way it works bud

__________________

you suck newb juice synpa. im never gona feed a drop of yours, you taint the OM by not feeding other drops!!

__________________
Blow It - Topical

This was a short piece, but it went right to the point. I think you need a little bit more elevation with vocabulary and imagery, so you may wanna work on that. Your structure is fine, and i like the way you could portray a message within those amount of lines.

Closed.
.
.
.

__________________

see...this is all i wanted...^^^^ feed back...shit like that is all i was asking for...

so maybe yall can follow that pattern............

Wut do u think my impression this site is when i drop my first text written and it gets slept on??

yall need to stop thinkin bout ur egos....this is a hip hop site aint it?? this is a site ment to help others and help people elevate, aint it??? then why the hell we bounded with rules that are holding us back???

its simple, as soon as i got feed back....^^^^....i would start doin the same.....but why would i give feed back on a site that sleeps on my threads....???

Thanks Suspicious, preciate that....maybe ill go give feed now, cuz now i see that at least one person will leave feed, and i return favours.......................

__________________