holy fuck man....
omg....

this was amazing...

jesus...i am
completly speechless...

it is screaming legend..
damn...A M A Z I N G

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serious, I ain't know she was dismembered too, or is that the same as the last girl they found.. there's some sick fuck runnin' round toronto right now, tha's fo-sure.. ne-way, this piece was ill as usual man, I liked the dlow of it, an' how the story went along perfect.. 1

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Dope.
Flow was superb, great love story with a twist - i enjoyed it. Possibly an RB legend, get one of these guys to nominate it for you man.

Great job.

haha that was madd ill..........its sorta 1 of em sotires that's liek says dont trust some one unlesss u knoe em.............

that was good....i liked it how the first 2 verses u acted like everything was going good n all.....but in the 3rd one it went horribly wrong........that was nice........................

"I tried a different style here. I don't usually tell stories."
i think it was good........keep the stories up

it sux that u lost ur penis....


but i aint goin against the grain, u know it was ill

wow pat!.....tight shit ..i really liked this...as i read this...the pain razored into my heart...it was scary ill admit...i really liked it

strong content and style...props for those

that was some deep hott shit...not what i expected...cuz im expecting just a big "blah" but damn....it was nice!

im gonna have to read more of ppls open mics...hehe

much respect pat...nice piece....RB legend?? piece speaks for itself!

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<br><br><center>- Shiznit -
- Tampons are still expensive -
- That's a Fact - </center>

I THOUGHT THIS WAS PHENOMINOL

the bes tpeice form the toronto gangsta hat man yet?...yes!.excellent story very well written,got gory goooood....hahahha gory is ill...but getitn his dick bit off kind a made me wince like ohhh dammit id kill her lmao...and i guess he did...nice imagery,flow on point,well written excellent ...

thanks saladin.....lol, I can't nominate my own piece, I would hate for it to be declined because of that

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Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

thanks trill

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Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

Sabrina was a girl who wore her heart on her sleeve,
letting what she felt show,at 16,she was hurt easily/
till one day she met a boy who acted just the same,
showed love, passion and disgust.he asked her name/
"I'm Sabrina" she replied and he said "my names Rob,
I've always watched you from afar"he said with a sob/
he claimed he loved her,knew that noone could best her,
viewing from the God's, perfection wearing polyester/
Sabrina found herself loving him more with each word,
already swept off her feet, and she never felt absurd/

A week or so later, Rob brought Sabrina to his home,
his parents had gone to Maui and left him all alone/
Rob stepped into the kitchen to cook them some food,
and Sabrina found herself sitting alone in his room/
she sat at his desk and saw his wallet sitting there,
she looked inside,his identification raised her hair/
Sabrina sat in shocked silence,not believing her eyes,
but there was no way around "driver's liscence, age:35"/
Rob got back in room and the silence still sustained,
he clubbed her head, she woke up on his bed chained/

Rob inserted himself into her mouth for first round,
she struggled and stuggled until she finally bit down/
detaching him from his manhood, Sabrina would regret,
he shouted in pain,the chains held her down like a net/
"you crossed the line,I didn't want to have to do this"
he drew the knife, and began carving signs in her tits/
she screamed and she screamed, but Rob kept inflicting,
the pain she hated, the chains just kept on restricting/
no matter how much she winced.look down at his endeavor,
Sabrina saw a heart carved, saying Rob + Sabrina forever...........

*Sabrina Tarantino was found dead last night. Her arms had been seperated from her torso, and her throat was slit. Robert Grant was found 10 feet from her with a knife lodged in his jugular. Police are still looking for those responsible.*

I tried a different style here. I don't usually tell stories.
Tell me what you think.
Peace

__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

thanks you two. RB Legend? shit, I didn't think it was that good.....
PEace

__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

up^

__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

up^

__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

slidin up................weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeee

__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis