Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
07-20-03, 12:26 PM | #1 | ||||||
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.. iF Only This Were a Dream ..
IP: 41E6 F21D
If Only This Were A Dream
Everydays a nightmare, im lost in a glimpse of dreams.. So i wait till i die, not to rest, but to wake up in peace.. im sinking, and everyone in this world lets me be, as i.. Drown deeper in this ocean of sin, everytime i breath.. My lungs burst and rip, inside i cant help but to give in.. Chokin at the bottom since no one taught me how to swim.. im out of it .. every second ticks, and soon my faith bleeds i watch my friends and family reach out, to suffercate me So slowly, i fade away to the dark as i close my eyes.. i got what i wanted, cause you never fully live, until you die.. And now i realize, my skins a barrier ..and beneath are lies.. im ready for hell, only to find, this hell flashes in my mind.. its like, the deepest image, played over millions of times.. And mine, was my moms face, as she heard the news and cried.. Erase it outta my mind .. now, i beg you, erase it please.. Dear god help me wake up .. but if only .. if only, it were a dream.. Last edited by ToNe-E : 07-20-03 at 12:36 PM. |
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07-20-03, 01:06 PM | #2 | ||||||
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IP: 41E6 F21D
Drop links i'll reply ..
and give you the same quality reply you give me .. |
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07-20-03, 01:27 PM | #3 | |||||||
BANNED for biting
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IP: B38F 7A05
Yo this was Nice man...It had a nice concept too it....U stayed on topic...the content of this was also nice....
And now i realize, my skins a barrier ..and beneath are lies.. im ready for hell, only to find, this hell flashes in my mind.. ^^^Favorite Line...Really liked that ish i hope too read more from u.......i give this a 9/10 If it was longer I would nominate it into R-B LEegend Return da favour http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=66935 Last edited by Bash : 07-20-03 at 01:36 PM. |
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07-20-03, 02:43 PM | #4 | |||
Sand
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IP: 9588 E886
word bash, nice reply
Tone. this was very nice. i felt it all the way through...your flow is always very strong and you used some nice word usage that made this piece all the better. My lungs burst and rip, inside i cant help but to give in.. Chokin at the bottom since no one taught me how to swim.. im out of it .. every second ticks, and soon my faith bleeds i watch my friends and family reach out, to suffercate me ^ that's dope as fuck ^ espescially that last line....damn.. are you going to enter the topical league? you could do well ....great job...pz
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[ Word for Word ]
Kevin. Alex. Patrick. John. |
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07-20-03, 03:59 PM | #5 | ||||||
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IP: 41E6 F21D
Thanks ..
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07-20-03, 04:39 PM | #6 | |||||
Shadow Boxing
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IP: 5D70 FAE2
Dope Shit Mister Tone ...
Flow Was Nice, Content Nice ... Nice Peice Kiddo .. Quote:
Nice ...pz
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Authentik Intelligence, ` Nuff Said. |
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07-20-03, 04:48 PM | #7 | ||||||||
Tickle My Sloth
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IP: 5B54 9553
Nice piece Tony, flow was dope, nice
take on this topic actually, good rhyme scheme, nicel=y structured, internals and externals helped witht he flow, as did your multi's. There were a couple lines i felt were quoteable, but bash mentioned my fave one, this was a dope opener though: Quote:
^Great way to open the piece up, set the tone nicely, good imagery, a nice little in-depth set up and flow was dope. Nice piece my man, i just wish it was longer : ( Props. |
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07-20-03, 04:57 PM | #8 | ||||||
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IP: 1769 3B0F
i thought this well composed would be an even better audio flow.you have a nack for doing what poetets thrive on and that is placing the indvidual right there with you that was very tight work i hope to see more from you.
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07-20-03, 05:16 PM | #9 | ||||||
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IP: 41E6 F21D
Thanks .. ^
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07-21-03, 08:45 AM | #10 | ||||||
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IP: 41E6 F21D
NIccaz up
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07-21-03, 11:46 AM | #11 | ||||
Straight Savage.
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IP: 8BEC CACE
This was fuckin ill. Yeah it was short, but to me it felt like maybe it was supposed o be short, cuz maybe if it was longer then it couldve messed up the piece.It had a good flow, nice structure, didn't have crazy vocabulary that wouldv'e fucked up my whole mind. It was a good drop. Lookin to see more from you
My lungs burst and rip, inside i cant help but to give in.. Chokin at the bottom since no one taught me how to swim.. im out of it .. every second ticks, and soon my faith bleeds i watch my friends and family reach out, to suffercate me So slowly, i fade away to the dark as i close my eyes.. i got what i wanted, cause you never fully live, until you die.. peep my piece If I ruled The World http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=67169
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Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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07-21-03, 02:09 PM | #12 | ||||||
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IP: 41E6 F21D
thanx ^
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07-21-03, 02:12 PM | #13 | ||||||
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IP: 99D5 9E82
Good sh it,liked tha hole thing,very poetic and a good drop dawg.
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