For all the times you spat on me, Fuck You
For all the lies, you backstabbed me, Fuck you
For the torment my soul went through, Fuck You
For the hell I saw only to lose, Fuck you
For the lack of truth, in those lying eyes, Fuck You
For the strength of my feelings, that I realise, Fuck You
For the questions why, questions alone, Fuck You
For the lack of answers, stolen throne, Fuck You
For my crestfallen mind, my precious beliefs, Fuck you
For my state, and my fallen sanity, Fuck You
For my emotions which are my virtue, Fuck You
For stepping on my vices, not seeing who, Fuck You
For all I put in that was dropped, Fuck You
For everything I do that's not loved, Fuck You
For my anger, my sensitivity, Fuck You
For my love, versatility, Fuck You
For being who I am, Fuck You
For seeing who you are, Fuck You
I Hate You, I Hate You, Fuck You
And I hate you more for knowing why...I Love You

I really seen that ending before I got to it....
But still...I enjoyed it...
I really can't find any faults in this piece....
It was hard hitting, deep and very impacting
Only suggestion I could have made was perhaps have
the "fuck you" on every bar instead of every line...
But iunno...
apart from that..this was perfect..

I jus wanna clear up that the obvious ending had to be obvious, and that's where the anger comes from, the fact that I can't escape the blatantness...
Concerning the 'fuck you' you're right, but I felt I had to spit it out at every free moment from surging emotions...

Hasn't anyone ever felt like just screaming out fuck you a hundred times? Nah, i'm just insane

Appreciate the view, lookin' for more...

this was aiight...but ive done this before...so i dont really know what to say...i wanna call you a biter...but you didnt know...you portreyed ya emotion in a coo conventional way....


igido

__________________
freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

Where? Let me see yours, drop a link, or sumthin', if it's been done I could remove it.....sorry, I didn't know, but people like Shiznit, Varentao and Bouncedoggydog know I'd never bite, especially not in poetry, I'm talented

Ya want this removed? It was just anger

you may or may not know of RB crashing numerous times...so ma poem isnt in the archives...but lives on still on RN...its quite old.....heres tha link...peep aiight...


http://forums.rapnetwork.com/showth...=&threadid=1682

peep...acknowledge...


igido

__________________
freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

leave ya poem though... its not that big an issue...i kinda like this


igido

__________________
freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

No dont remove it. Its good.
Unfortunately, you have already said what I was going to say after reading the piece.. This is just pure anger.. Yet, it's still a love poem.. a paradox really well done.
Flow was great, the rhyming was subtle and not forced, it wasnt over worked..
And yes, I know Ive felt at times so angry and frustrated that Ive wanted to just yell out Fuck You to the the sky, the World, the people around me, everything.

__________________

Thanks to tourniquet for having an inexplicable link wit me, always understands...

It's all diff except the Fuck you, but the fact I put it on the other side looks suspicious, that's not really fair, even if I didn't know, your idea, your anger...my apology...

Someone close this, if punishment is needed so be it, I relieved my anger anyway...and this is about new idea's and experiences, sorry madd...

Close it

lol...deciet....you are very humble in a manner of which i accept....you do the thug thizzle....this thread will stay open...and your poetry will be read by the many of other young poet who need elevation....

there are only a select few who's poetry is actually tools of elevation mine included....you are one of the acceptional poets that is apart of the 'league of poet elevation'...


igido

__________________
freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

I like him

Thanks, dog, and do I detect some ego? Remember, I'm 15, I have a teenager's temperament!!!!!!!!

Anymore feedback, idea's or input???

I THOUGHT IT WAS THE GAYEST THING I EVER READ





















NOT IT WAS COOL I ENJOYED AND IT WAS EASY TO READ I LIKED READIN IT I DIDNT GET BORED AT ALL

Ya almost had me, thanks, anything more???

The reoccuring Atmosphere Fuck You Lucy theme
just reworded for your satisfaction...you dont seem
like someone who woud do this on purpose but
Eternal~Evidence just reworded the 'superman'
lyrics for six lines so it all just carried over to this..
you didnt copy..I liked it*

this was hard hitting and goes as a shot for
closeminded assholes...phony friends...
relationships...anything that annoys seperated
from what you would rather deal with no matter what...

'all from a simple fuck you'

not bad by any means..well done

la paz