replyed to
1-infinate skillz-rememberin us
2-JoJo-we all human
3-JoJo-insomniac


i wrote my verse about a break up i had not so long ago.

white lightning- verses 1 and 2
double-0 seven
chorus- in italics


What The Fuck Am I, Supposed To Do
This Girl Just Ain't The One I Got To Knew
Everytime I Gettin My Gitty Hopes Up
She Smashes 'Em Like A Fragile China Cup
She Was My Boo, The One To Never Let Me Down
It Was Gunna Work Travelin From Town To Town
A Positive Influence, Turn a Thug Into An Angel
A Different Viewpoint, A Fresh New Angle
Things Seemed Rock Hard, Not a Single Flaw
Than One Day She Grabed A Verbal Chainsaw
Cut Down Who I Was, Squashed Me Into Da Ground
This Wasn't Something, I So Proudly Found
This Woman Said We Could See Any Problem Through
I Listened, She Made Me Look Like A Silly Fool
She Preached How I Needed To Respect Ya
Gimme One Reason I Don't Swing 'n' Back Ya


i wrote this for a girl, to show my expressions,
upon me shes printed an everlasting impression,
she was the one with which i shared my passion,
this is the end now, nothin, no more questions,


I Gave You My Heart And You Tore It Out
This Was The First Time I Had A Little Doubt
Why Do I Continue To Put My Trust In a Female
The Just Bend You Over, It's Like Bubba In Jail
When We Started It Seemed We Needed No Such Label
Flipped A Coin And It Started The Similar Fabel
Where The Fuck Did My Judgement Go So Sour
It's Like I Seen More Class When, Payin' By The Hour
I Was Prepared To Sacrifice Anything For You
There Was Nothing I Wouldn't Do
You Seemed To Understand Everything About Me
It Wasn't A Fog, It Was Clear For You To See
I Gave The Real Person That Was Clealy Inside
I Made Every Effort To Constantly Confide
Your Parents Seemed To Raise Ya Good And Propa
But Somewhere The Musta Dropped Ya


i wrote this for a girl, to show my expressions,
upon me shes printed an everlasting impression,
she was the one with which i shared my passion,
this is the end now, nothin, no more questions,


i remember, the relationship started on a strong basis,
but the aruments started, no reason, just talkin shit,
remeber the love we shared, when it was just basic
but back then it was strong, like concrete and bricks,
after all the time we've spent, its got more complex,
the cracks started to forms, and rats began in infest,
ur friends, in lies they manifest, but only caused stress,
i know its a mess, at present my love is what you posess,
your the reason, i used to walk round, smile on face,
whatever the season, even the winter i would brace,
just to see you, your eyes, and smell your perfume,
i could feel envy. when eyes followed your out the room,
you was my guidning light, at the end of a dark place,
i never thought we would fight, stand face to face,
like natural feelings exist in the world of a mother,
i felt 'farther' that this, for one i used to call lover.


i wrote this for a girl, to show my expressions,
upon me shes printed an everlasting impression,
she was the one with which i shared my passion,
this is the end now, nothin else, no more questions,

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<center><img src=http://www.rhymevantage.com/forum/attachment.php?s=&postid=6921=1 border=0></center>

This was dope, I wanna be best open mic head at D.O.I but judgin by this I've got tough competition.
White your verses were flowin brilliantly and your vocab was up to par eventho your like me and concentrate on tellin a story rather than vocab. Good drops
double-0 seven your verse was similar to White's.....very creative and heartfelt with flow and vocab. well done.
The chorus was short and sweet....could have been a couple lines longer tho

Overall dope collab 8.5/10

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HARRY R.I.P
1940 - 2002

In Respect

This was a great creative piece, you showed talent in this for real, had some great lines and amazing wordplay your flow was on point in this great, very well writ keep it up man...

can ye hit up my battle in my sig wit an honest vote...it is being slept on thanks man...peace

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Open Mics
The Weathers Art
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108673
My Teenage Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...threadid=104850
Secluded
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...851#post1148851
Open Your Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...461#post1157461

thanks for the feedback peeps, drop y'all links an i'll review your piece

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<center><img src=http://www.rhymevantage.com/forum/attachment.php?s=&postid=6921=1 border=0></center>

This was a nice read, ..good vocab and a steady flow, ..with an ok concept, ..structure was good, ..and the end result was a nice read = )

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Fuck you

dis was a nice piece good vocab and a nice flow even tho I did read sum it b4 ya'll posted on open mic
9/10

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BEST OF YJ
Holla at cha Boi
Watch Me
Eyez of a Young Nigga

anybody else wanna comment on this shit
drop ya links to 'open mic', or 'poetry' pieces

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<center><img src=http://www.rhymevantage.com/forum/attachment.php?s=&postid=6921=1 border=0></center>

anybody else

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<center><img src=http://www.rhymevantage.com/forum/attachment.php?s=&postid=6921=1 border=0></center>

uppin

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I Speak Out
Battles
Pink Slips 007 Pt. 2

This was tight man, you are a very talented artist. Sorry for your loss everyone has heart ache ya herd just keep thinkin about tommorrow yesterday's gone. You got good skills. This piece looks like it took you some real time and real effort. You are a blessing to open mic. p.s. I saw ur pic in the other furum ur a cutie. anyways pz and luv.

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Let God speak for the underground Psalm 49 16-17
16 Do not be overawed when a man grows rich when the splendor of his house increases
17 For he will take no thing with him when he dies, his splendor will not descend with him
18Though while he lived he counted himself blessed - and men praise you when you prosper-
19 He will join the generation of his fathers, who will never see the light of life

20 A man who has riches without understanding is like the beasts that perish