Umm... 50... Honestly man, you got some good ideas, and that could have made a good topical if you could have put it in to lyrics better... Your long line short line structure isnt working for me at all, killing the flow... And looking at your last bar, it doesnt rhyme in the slightest... You have potential but this topical seriously has a lot of things you can improve on... 4/10.

Valor... Well, i think it started off with a real hot bar, that first one was definetly a good bar to hook the readers in to reading the rest... Should have explained what happened better, i mean, only thing i really know is he was in a car crash, just leaces me with a few questions i guess... By the way the font makes some of your lines look stretched when they really arent, hurtin yaself there... But good topical man... 8/10

V/Valor