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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
01-18-05, 03:50 PM
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#8
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1926
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IP:
Truthfully I Wasnt Really Feeling It...
I Liked The Concept And Where You Were Trying To Go With It... But You Actually Writing Elements Were Weak... Like Your Rhyming, Example:Strongly/Emcee???... Sorry Mayn Thats Pretty Forced... The Chorus Could Use Some Work Aswell... Your Chorus Was To Much Like Verse Lines... Tryn Make It Short And More Cetchy... Not All Long And Verse Like... Uuuuuum Thats About It, You Actually Didnt Really Need A Chorus... Since It Was Only One Verse, But Its All Good... Thats All I've Got To Say... Stay Up And Keep Writing Mayn... .One. |
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