Past life-surpass strife- i sit amass night-and fast write-
my last rights-sealed with my class blood type-
the stryfe-of having nothing left isnt right-
so i resite-the only decisionin irony and plite-

dear mother dont cry in pain-just sustain-
it's not your fault ....maintaint-
though i couldnt ...as i sit slit with razor to my veign-
this pain-release as my tears rain-
they mix with agony as my body drain-

im taken the weak way out-but this route-
is the first decision i made with no doubt-
as i bleed i hear the last words from her mouth-

' 'you did this it's your fault''-
before she stormed out in the storm i felt a jault-
to stop her but my ignorance placed me to a hault-

saw the car pull ouTside-then saw it pulled aside-on its' side-
i held her in nervous arms and watched her die-
the drunk murderer still in his ride.still questioning why?

im questioning how?
to a god that didnt exsist and i was denied-

screaming out loud-to the croud-
within my tear infested shroud-and dark cloud-

apologizen please wake up....nah nah she aint no wake up-
dont do this-
dont leave me like this as i recall i see that pain pour from my wrist-

feeling faint-body covered in distaint paint-the taint-
in me once to curse my life in ink but i fear time runs late-

i have to....i aint got the strength to-
HA! i'll prove it to you-
SEE ! SEE ? see what did i do?I see you-

screamin it's to soon-
"CLEAR" this spells doom-
"CLEAR,we're loosing his pulse" i can taste my angels perfume-
as i am consumed-
to touch her as she nods her head i wake up in an emergancy room-

hospitol I.V.S- god why me? why keep me alive?
why is it not i why couldnt she survive?

it's been 2 years to this day-
not one nights that it doesbt replay-
not once do i say-
why not me i swear life is so dark it's been that long since i seen the break of day-
REST IN PEACE JULIA I LOVE YOU ALWAYS.
1979-2001