RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 01-17-04, 08:47 AM   #1
Ill-Fresh
New to RB
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Oct 2003
From: C-Town
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-3
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
Enemies & Myself

IP: C400 C802

...speak my thoughts...
...prejudice gates often combine - leave me hangin like grapes on a vine -
then i grip a mic - or sit and type - or sit and write - my mind sick
of the fight - my temper slips and ignites - im tired of pretending -
im tired of be friending - the fight never ending - not getting
across the message i am sending - no matter how hard i try - it
still tears apart my life - afraid of my chasin my dreams like the
cars sick type - cruisin and loosin my youth - speakin the facts yet
loosin the truth - loosin sight of what is real - holdin tight but cant
grasp what i feel - i bare it all like the naked - dont care at all if i
make it - stare all you want i can take it - i just cant take all the
fakeness - and i am contemplatin why you wont listen - like
hypocrits you lie and want forgiveness - please just hear me out -
but the truth hurts so youll probly fear me now - but you wont
understand - you wont try to be a man - and try to be a friend - i
hope this puts a tear in your heart - i hope now you are aware of your heart - dont be pre judge quit your stares and your remarks...

hook: 2x
...i just try to laugh it off...i just try until the end...
...but they cant grasp the talk...wont let the voice speak within...

...thoughts to myself...
...a clip of thoughts enters my mind - no doubt i drift in thoughts
from time to time - but i try to remind myself bout trip of the real
life - sometimes i feel i cant go on - dunno whats real and right
from wrong - suicide enters my mind - open a drawer and grip on the knife - look in the mirror what is life - i only grow older in time -
life only grows colder at night - what is the meanin - to life what
is the reasonin - ask yourself why you keep on believin - just run
away - the fun dont stay - life then begins to bore - my thoughts
then decore - it anit over like what of the life of a whore -
everyone goes through drama - whos the babies daddy and
where is your drunk mama - please dont end my life with a period
give me apause of a comma - i drown in my thoughts and the
blood spills - i awake from my trans and put away the drugs and
pills - who am i - who am i...

hook: 2x
...i just try to laugh it off...i just try until the end...
...but they cant grasp the talk...wont let the voice speak within...


--------------------------------------------------------------------------
1st verse...
a message to those who will listen

2nd verse...
thoughts and things i go through
Send a message via AIM to Ill-Fresh   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-04, 05:21 PM   #2
Ill-Fresh
New to RB
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Oct 2003
From: C-Town
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-3
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: C400 C802

uppin...
Send a message via AIM to Ill-Fresh   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-04, 06:37 PM   #3
Ill-Fresh
New to RB
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Oct 2003
From: C-Town
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-3
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: C400 C802

uppin...
Send a message via AIM to Ill-Fresh   Reply With Quote
Old 01-25-04, 02:16 AM   #4
wogzta
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 5C4B 9DFC

this wasnt that bad at all... you had some nice concepts... lyrically wasnt great, not many multies, but it had some decent vocab and it flowed.... but YOU NEED TO FIX UP YOUR STRUCTURE. PLEASE!!! this was practically impossible to read. make all your lines be just that... ONE LINE. not one long line then a short line beneath it... otherwise, keep dropping, you will elevate eventually...

6/10
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:42 AM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.