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Reload this Page ..Broken Dreams..(Short Story)-{Take Your Time and Read)
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Old 02-16-04, 03:58 PM   #16
Penskills
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bio*Chemist
Great story line pretty long it said short story …but I guess it was to you.
Nice very nice unique concepts. Reminds of dreams I have. I wonder do
You have abstract weird dreams? Anyways nice drop as usual keep it up
Peace.

^Thanks...and about the Dreams...I think we all have crazy dreams..
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Old 02-16-04, 05:18 PM   #17
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pen another dope drop...
like LM said u sed short story... Not full length movie...
and I say mvoie because of the imagery it wus like
you are watching it not reading it... this wus ill man
imagery, flow wus a bit off to me maybe it flowed to you...
the topic eh... the way u used the topic wus dope tho...
I can't compete with this I don't think lol...
any way check my newest Tragic Death(II)...
_-SyaNidal-_...
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Old 02-16-04, 06:11 PM   #18
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ok my first impresion is damn i cant read all this. But its suprisingly easy since it always keeps you in the story. Hmm prop one of the best things iv read ina while Props man.....you always come good
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Old 02-16-04, 06:45 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eki
ok my first impresion is damn i cant read all this. But its suprisingly easy since it always keeps you in the story. Hmm prop one of the best things iv read ina while Props man.....you always come good


^Thanks for taking your time to read this story..^^
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Old 02-16-04, 06:59 PM   #20
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LOL, you and your "short" story's. anyway. very well done my man, I don't know how you can have the gumption to sit down and right a 500 bar essay like this, but whatever it is that drives you to do so, would be most welcome in my repetoirre. but anyways. nice piece, good vocab, decent flow. I have always loved your imagery and this piece is no exception. very good job, keep em coming, and use a smaller font lol, makes the structure look better. 8/10
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Old 02-17-04, 10:30 PM   #21
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Bump..Bump..Bump...
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Old 02-18-04, 12:08 AM   #22
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This was okay
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Old 02-18-04, 12:15 AM   #23
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This wuz a good piece. It wuz long as hell, but it kept me reading. Good flow and imagery. dope story line.

8/10

drop feedback on my piece: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=115121
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Old 02-18-04, 12:24 AM   #24
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damn.. lots of replies.. i wish i got replies this quick...

Yep .. another dope piece bye the rabbit guy.. this was like detaield alot i could almost see it.. well i did in my head but hey im not gunna go into penskilled details wait.. i could write a song about this!!!! lol well this shit was good.. even if it was looooong as hell.. your shit kept me into it.. good piece.. correction another good piece
you got skills...


hit this up
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=115099
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