Aight i'll start with the the bad points first..like everyone else said, you vocab needs to be upped, get more desriptive with your words, to give more of a feel to the rhyme.
same with wordplay work on that....sooner or later you get better at it.

As for the good points,
The flow was pretty persistant, pretty basic, but it stayed for the most part. Your structure wasn't to bad, a few line were a little stretched, but that's aight. Anywho keep droppin, the more you write the better you get

Much Respect....