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10-23-04, 06:17 PM | #1 | ||||||
New to RB
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Acknowledged hey yall please leave comments on dis and on mt utha poems
IP: D074 D835
Acknowledged In the shores of hidden hurt I lurk Fuelled by anger I heroically stand Broken dreams and vows brushed aside Within my eyes prowl lessons Fronting like I can’t be messaged Knowing there isn’t no other path Breathing hoping this one will be my last Don’t place accusations against me God threw down blankets of depression I’m despised because I’m being real Creator not knowing why I was produced I’m violent flow considered a threat Come out of sitcoms and accept reality Pretending to be your idols don’t help It’s gonna hurt more when it bashes you It’s gonna send icy pulsations throw your soul That’s why I acknowledge the devastation now I am not an angel but I hunger to be accepted My intentions like ropes pulling me threw Good is being compressed threw me Yet I still keep to my place in society My package will be damaged if I turn my back Except your place, pay a visit to reality Don’t be mad at me for bringing the truth Confess to where you crop up in this sphere See, when your finished finding blue’s clues You have to head for the exit, it’s a one way road It’ll hit you like a sandstorm on the vacant desert I will not smile, lift my head and say I told you so I’ll continue in my benz, journey on my road Nobody stopped to help me, so I’ll let u get to your feet Blue’s Clues is therapy for no established man I acknowledged it now you simply failed to understand By Lena Arshad |
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10-24-04, 01:25 PM | #2 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 69CD 4DC8
Hey yall id lyke u 2 leave ya comments it dnt need 2 b an essay jus a simple yeh i felt it or naw i think u suck
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10-24-04, 01:32 PM | #3 | |||||
New to RB
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IP: 32D5 4FAB
I Think It Was Decent. It Kinda Lost My Interest Tho, Because There Was Nothing That Really Caught My Attention. You Had Good Word Play, And Pretty Good Vocab, But I Didnt Really Feel Any Depth To The Poem. You Had Good Visuals, But No Real Story Line, Or Any Shit Like That. It Was Decent Tho. Work On What You Write And Try To Make It More Deep Thro The Way Your Word Things, Try To Set A Mood For The Poem, Like Sorrow, Anger, Happiness, Ect.
Decent Work Tho Keep Writing |
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10-24-04, 04:39 PM | #4 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 2375 8256
thnx could u do me a fave and check out my utha poems pweze
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10-24-04, 04:41 PM | #5 | |||||
New to RB
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IP: 32D5 4FAB
maybe u would get more feed back if u gave others feed back..
*hint hint*
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when we come through pushing new trucks
bitches be pushing and shoving to look at us they go (ooh ooh) yeah take a good look bitch this might be last time you'll see gangsters like this Mobb Deep Get away |
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10-25-04, 01:08 AM | #6 | |||||||
Light Weight
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IP: 3240 794D
GOOD SHIT I liked it i give it a 7.9/10
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My level of battle is your problem. Not minds. So dont toss me till to you tried me. This is my ring. You cant box me. I'll drop rocky. I've climbed the mountain's Making all contenders obsolete. All you bitches is running like water fountain knocking me!! Defeat list Young Beezy out come:5-o Lost Battles:none out come none |
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10-25-04, 12:25 PM | #7 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: 695B 24D0
yo man i leave fedback on uthas stuff 2 dey still dnt leave feedback on mine
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10-25-04, 02:39 PM | #8 | ||||
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IP: 0825 899A
yo
It was pretty iight what makes a good poet is connecting with the reader...vocab is good,as long as they understand... 7/10 feed mine if you feel...
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The Competition
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10-25-04, 11:13 PM | #9 | |||||
<<-Carpe Noctum->>
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IP: DDF2 7C41
this was good,never seen you in here before,but no tbad gurl...i liked the subject, and the flow,,good job,just leave replies to thers work..pc
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"QUOD ME NUTRIT, ME DESTRUIT--AUT VINCERE AUT MORI" O Y D *FluidMusic* *Poetic Scriptures Moderator* |
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10-28-04, 11:56 AM | #10 | ||||||
New to RB
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IP: C9F9 4C34
Yo Man Yall Check Out My Utha Poems One's Called Thoughts And The Utha Is Called Her Book
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