I have won every battle i have gone in..you have lost every battle you have gone in..

i think i have the right to say STFU

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so if u so hot cdusit why is our battle still open? i eman if peple went 2 high school n payed attention in english class cats could read i rhyme through out my flows all da time n evrytime i drop a line shit fire get sum muthafucka's in here who aint dick riders n haters n finish dis damn votin for this battle damn niggaz wtf is goin on ya'll sleepin?

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my new shit peep

Voted For: Cdusit

Ok

Cdusit

never thought id battle a kid who hasnt posted ten times
this battles unreal ....like dudes got pretend rhymes
- Weak
his first time on the frontlines..but name states war
Im controlling his outcome....like a position in saw
- Eh...
The decision is raw im submitting his gore kids hitting th floor
War needs more support in this battle like double D's
- Ok but basic
Unsure why he even stepped up maybe newbs like defeat
maybe he likes to be left behind like a bikers seat
- Eh...could have worded this much better
like repeat this feels like a case of de ja vu
cause not even ya alias voting ring could com thru
- Nah...

Not a strong verse, some lines were ok and others I could see what you were trying to do...but you need to diss your opponent more and be more clear in your disses as well as word them better...You can improve in this area if you keep trying, otherwise the rhyming was good and flow was fine as well...good structure to the verse as well


allik war

lintroduction:

:referree clears throat:
excuse me son u think this daycare,
u knew 2 da game nigga i dont care,
jus spit yo 16 nigga n challenge if u dare,
so if ya in da wrong room please exit there//

- WHAT? Glad the intro is over and done with....

i shatter punchlinewhen i push up when its crunch time,
i give lines meaning n life but through my pain n strife,
- Your not dissing the opponent or attempting to
ya soon 2 be wife and dis game is mine,
my system of words blocks competition,
- Your gonna marry him?
like ya corner gas station atm reciept reads declined,
im inclined,2 b on da grind//
- Where are the punchlines?

spittin venemous verses,leavin ya cursin,
go beserk,while im jerkin ya girls bra strap,stop put down da gun son rememba this only rap//
- Eh?

no seriously,its not dat serious its flow,i know ya gettin delirious,im fearless,but by da end evryone on here but u will b tearless!//
- And?

lil rusty gotta wake my immagination up...or was my twin?
- What?


Are you sure frontlines is for you? where to start...

Ok, I have no idea if you are new but it seems like it...you need to do better than that, to improve you will need to try and diss the opponent rather than talk about yourself...remember this is a BATTLE

Just make your lines witty, try dissing by looking at what other more experienced battlers do....have a structure to your verse, and use personals to attack....always try to be witty with your lines man...

You got a lot of improvement to do, but you got to start somewhere....


Cdusit won this no doubt.......

And vote honestly on mine
http://community.rapverse.com/showb...ad.php?t=216087

Peace

ayt slicknife u must only b use 2 1 type of style but n e ways i no where near new homie i admit this shit aint as could as i could b but damn dude was jus as whack as me on this n e ways this battle whack shit freakin been open 4 like 3 months n niggaz still aint finish votin this shit sum1 else who bout rap n not net beef n dick ridin hit me up 4 a battle n keep it music cuz i dont give a fuck who dick u ridin.......btw at least i rhymed all the way through...hahaha oh welll ill gladly give u this lil bitch but when its on again u betta ressurect sum dead rappers 2 help u kid word peace...man close this blunt'ed i mean c'mon y not u do everything i drop hata haha

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my new shit peep

damn you had to set your battle up thats sorry peepin the polls

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THE TRUTH IS I'M BETTER THAN YOU

wut u doin lexikon bein smart n checkin wut ur gettin in or about 2 bite off from sum1?

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my new shit peep

Voted For: Cdusit

hmmmm this is more 1 sided than I'd of thought it would be... but Cd pretty convincingly handled war on this on... rusty or no

Opener: CD
Closer: CD
Punches: CD
Personals: CD
Complexity: CD
Creativity: CD
Enjoyment: CD
Structure: CD

Vote: CD

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