Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
12-15-05, 07:17 PM | #16 | ||||||||
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IP: 1FFF C108
Quote:
word dawg thanx loads for that Zero LMAO |
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12-15-05, 09:13 PM | #17 | |||||||
Ya mom massages my nuts
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IP: C3CE 96D1
typing as I listen....not feeling intro the "hahaha" is jus corny...quality needs work....first verse...opens wit good energy but it starts to whine down as it goes on..an the flow is repetitve...need to change hook....lyrics wasn't decent....hook is decent...it was mixed poorly...cant make out words...ok 2nd verse opens wit good energy again....but it lacks emotion...ya jus yelling instead of conveying a real emotion....need to work on effectively using influctions....flow on this verse was same as first...def showing great improvement...keep dropping man....1
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Haters spend all they time hating on another's life
Then wonder why when presenting there's to others...no one looks twice Because at the end of the day, you get what you give So, when you consumed with his...don't get mad when everyone else is |
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12-16-05, 04:23 AM | #18 | |||||||
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IP: 1FFF C108
thanx for the help trip
uppin!!!! |
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12-16-05, 04:24 AM | #19 | ||||
Odi et Amo
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IP: 09AB 3F4B
Hahaha...hmmm it gets annoying after while lmao...sowwy cutie...
Aight, you come in strong but try to keep it up throughout the entire verse ya feel. Lyrics be cool, I like the concept haha. Can up the rhyme scheme, throw more similar sounds n multis in there to make it smoother and more complex ya feel. I can understand everything now actually...but quality needs work...cannot wait till you get em new mic... Hook is a nice add-on but I couldn't always understand it because beat was coming up louder than his vocals. Second verse, basically same as first...gotta get that strong delivery throughout entire verse because in beginning you always like BLAOW but then it wears off ya know...Flow be on point, you definitely improving there... Just try something different with your rhyme scheme, throw some attention grabbers in there, keep that emotion strong throughout entire verse...but you improving like whoa...keep it up...real feed, no hate but you know that already Collab? Soon...without a doubt...
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Authentik Intelligence ...The future is mine... |
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12-16-05, 05:46 AM | #20 | |||||||
Bangs like bikini attol
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IP: DF10 FA26
Takes me a sec to get used to the accent... If you listen to how RZA ripped that beat, he was kind of rhyming outside of bars, thats why its so slow and gloomy when you try to rap normally on it and that is why you prolly felt like you were dragging on while rapping that...
Prolly a bad beat choice for the flow you chose... I think on ya next track, you should aim for a faster flow, go hard out on the multis and try to clean up your production a bit.. At times ya mic sounded like a telephone... But yeah, thats my 2 cents..... |
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12-16-05, 08:20 PM | #21 | ||||||
Whys That?
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IP: 5285 DC82
Like the intro. Spitting is solid and raw. usually the english accent stears me away from the track, but i liked this flow. hook is solid aswell.
nice track. |
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12-17-05, 03:26 PM | #22 | ||||
Ike
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IP: 3053 F660
listening...
flow is on beat...try not taking so many pauses is the only complaint i have there... delivery is definitely getting better...your spitting with a lot more emotion and your delivery is a lot more exciting... hook is ok.... 2nd verse is better as far as the pauses.... id say get a new mic man...your getting a lot better quickly.....if your quality was better...itd only make it that much better.... work on those pauses.....and other than that your doing well....
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