Voted For: Heavy Artillery

<<< BREAKDOWN >>>

Heavy Artillery:
Yo this kid steps up, not knowing who hes stepping to
this cat lost one already, I'm about to make it 2.
If you think that rappin is the way you better take a detour
I'm ready to blow up on 5, and you wont even C4.
Lol ok first bar was ok, second bar was iffy.. im not really feeling either of them.. but they are straight disses..
And where Im from the blocks be so hot your feet'll melt
and if we aiming from a distance then you'll be sure to see yourself.
This cat claims to be the best but yo the best is yet to come
this niggas "easy-baked" so come up off the mic your done.
Ok self rep on the first bar, thats a no no.. and your disses were really weak on your second bar..
He wants to spit it hard, but wait who ordered his ugly flows
when it comes to battling me you comin up shorter that mugsy bouges.
lol, ok good punch...

Ok this verse was alright, had some weak lines.. and only one punchline that was good.. you could of added wordplay, and some complexity to really get this verse going, but.. it was really plain..

RED BEAM:
lyrically abusing MC's, i thought u heard i dont stop
my name rings bells like sunday at 12 o'clock
this is a straight rhyme battle, no personals or beef
red beam rips beats like hoe ripping these streets
Wow, good flow.. BUT WAY TO MUCH SELF REP.. This is a battle, dont talk about your self... DIss your opponent..
suprised my dick aint silver, tha way im fucking these dymes
and u'd think i was a angry cokehead,tha way im "punching-these-lines"
i eat a pound of chicken, cause i love spittin greasy
and i think ur tha one hating cause u cant please me
Dude, way to much self rep.. you gotta be throwin disses on the real.. instead your talkin bout you this you that..
but im straight, like indian hair, get it right
and u'd think my dick was a floppy disk, tha way u "saving- these-bytes"
i roll right, you roll left, or somewhere outta my sight
one hit, knocking out ya lights, nigga saying good night
wow the first actual shot at your opponent.. but a little to late in the verse..


Ok your verse was on point.. but it wasnt a battle verse, you had way to much self rep.. you need to throw disses.. not gloat bout your punches or your rhymes..


<<< KONTENT >>>

Punches : RB.. too much self rep though
Wordplay: RB.. ^^
Flow: BOTH
Multies: BOTH
Disses: HA
Personals: n/a
Vokab: n/a
Fav Line: RB, coke punching lines line..
enjoyment: RB, but you should of battled not self repped.




So Heavy Gets My Vote, Because His Verse Was A Battle VErse And Did Not Have Alot Of Self Rep.. RB, throw more disses next time, and your sure to win..


REPAY THE FAVOR~~HIT MY SIG UP FOR THE BATTLE AGAINST 4FIL !!!!!

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RV got some suck ass voters

Voted For: RED BEAM

Aii RED BEAM
I Dont Really like Your Attitude but I Cant Hate If Ya Got Skills mAyne Much Respect To ya Bcuz Ya kelt This One The only thing your really Lacked was A few Personals But other Than That i Liked Ya verse.....
NOW H.A.
You Were very BAsic Mayne im sorry To say That you Seem like you didnt Try hard Enough But n e Way I Hope you Dp Betta next Time

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Plz Vote In My Battles Atleast Two Plz I Dont Have N e Votes At All Plz Do Me The Favor
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i know it was too much rep...i said i wasnt droppin any real disses in this one. i was just flowing off tha top...man fuck yall...from now on im setting up battles, fuck this 20 to post shit...uppn again

Voted For: Heavy Artillery


If you think that rappin is the way you better take a detour
I'm ready to blow up on 5, and you wont even C4.
<<i LIKE THIS

lyrically abusing MC's, i thought u heard i dont stop
my name rings bells like sunday at 12 o'clock
<wHACK

Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation.

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[IMG]

Voted For: Heavy Artillery

winna: Heavy (narrowly)
heavy
best line:"Yo this kid steps up, not knowing who hes stepping to
this cat lost one already, I'm about to make it 2.
If you think that rappin is the way you better take a detour
I'm ready to blow up on 5, and you wont even C4.
"
(liked it a lot!)
worst line:
"this niggas "easy-baked" so come up off the mic your done.
"(didnt really feel that 1 line)
heavy artillery, good battle steeped your game up and took it to him congrats

red beam
best line:
"suprised my dick aint silver, tha way im fucking these dymes
and u'd think i was a angry cokehead,tha way im "punching-these-lines"
i eat a pound of chicken, cause i love spittin greasy"
worst line:"my name rings bells like sunday at 12 o'clock
this is a straight rhyme battle, no personals or beef
red beam rips beats like hoe ripping these streets"
red did improve significantly afterwards but its only thru that heavy didnt have as low a point as red. good flow, tight battle but i prefer heavy artillerys flow, sorry dog honest vote.

Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation.

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Voted For: RED BEAM

Emcee:RED BEAM

Verse:
lyrically abusing MC's, i thought u heard i dont stop
my name rings bells like sunday at 12 o'clock
~~~~~Nice punch but a lil self glorifying
this is a straight rhyme battle, no personals or beef
red beam rips beats like hoe ripping these streets
~~~~~again nice but a lil self glorifying
suprised my dick aint silver, tha way im fucking these dymes
and u'd think i was a angry cokehead,tha way im "punching-these-lines"
~~~~~Nice meta...and a lil wordplay
i eat a pound of chicken, cause i love spittin greasy
and i think ur tha one hating cause u cant please me
~~~~~first line was dope..
but im straight, like indian hair, get it right
and u'd think my dick was a floppy disk, tha way u "saving- these-bytes"
~~~~~Killer...thats the K.O
i roll right, you roll left, or somewhere outta my sight
one hit, knocking out ya lights, nigga saying good night
~~~~~ok meta...

Comments:not bad work on not glorifying yourself aiight fam...a lil more vocab too

Marks:
Wordplay - 6/10
Metas - 6/10
Vocabulary - 5/10
Structure - 6/10
Punches - 7/10
Opener - 5/10
Closer – 5/10
Personals – 4/10
Enjoyment – 6/10
Creativity - 7/10
Overall - 57/100
~~~~~~57%


Emcee:Heavy Artillery

Verse:
Yo this kid steps up, not knowing who hes stepping to
this cat lost one already, I'm about to make it 2.
~~~~~Gay...
If you think that rappin is the way you better take a detour
I'm ready to blow up on 5, and you wont even C4.
~~~~~nice meta...
And where Im from the blocks be so hot your feet'll melt
and if we aiming from a distance then you'll be sure to see yourself.
~~~~~ok....
This cat claims to be the best but yo the best is yet to come
this niggas "easy-baked" so come up off the mic your done.
~~~~~blah....a meta..nothin special
He wants to spit it hard, but wait who ordered his ugly flows
when it comes to battling me you comin up shorter that mugsy bouges.
~~~~~best line...

Overall....i think that red beam takes this because he came off harder....heavy...just elevate fam...not bad for your second battle...

Return the Favor in the sig..

V/Redbeam


Comments:

Marks:
Wordplay -
Metas -
Vocabulary -
Structure -
Punches -
Opener -
Closer –
Personals –
Enjoyment –
Creativity -
Overall -

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whoops sorry i posted another voting template...haha sorry..

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