RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 07-30-05, 11:00 AM   #1
Daubs
NO SURRENDER
 
Daubs's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,604
From: Salford
IP:

Thanks for the good feed, ima return now.
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-30-05, 12:25 PM   #2
Kamze
Light Weight
 
Kamze's Avatar
 
Posts: 204
From: Manchester,UK
IP:

Good stuff Daubs. Good flow and structure.

.'This isnt about power, its deeper, the ultimate test..
..With one final praer i tie my gloves and hope for the best'

That was the best line, it was the killer punch after you had built up the tension.
Send a message via Yahoo to Kamze   Reply With Quote
Old 08-02-05, 09:32 PM   #3
Daubs
NO SURRENDER
 
Daubs's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,604
From: Salford
IP:

safe^

up...............
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-02-05, 10:33 PM   #4
MADDRAPPER
Middle Weight
 
Posts: 1,550
IP:

Aw Naw Again Some Dream Ass Poetry You Didn't Get Grimy Hell Put This In A Story Book Not Rap At All You Wrote This For Poetry Heads And Again Fuck Poetry No True Atitude In That Shit
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-02-05, 10:42 PM   #5
Daubs
NO SURRENDER
 
Daubs's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,604
From: Salford
IP:

Its not poetry you herb, its a tpical..the topic was fight night.

I can do grimey shit too, check some battles / om's.
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-03-05, 08:22 AM   #6
~Luciano~
~Break Bred or Play Dead~
 
~Luciano~'s Avatar
 
Posts: 6,827
From: $.W Detroit
IP:

this was a nice drop

good wordplay

had kind of an ol school structure

that seems 2 be everyones begining structure

but this was str8 drop

7/10
__________________


.
.

.
.


.
.

~~Bumpin My Musik~~
~Audio Rookie Of The Year..Ya Tha Real 1~

Send a message via AIM to ~Luciano~ Send a message via Yahoo to ~Luciano~   Reply With Quote
Old 08-03-05, 10:48 AM   #7
Payn
Middle Weight
 
Payn's Avatar
 
Posts: 514
From: Washington, DC
IP:

yea i agree w/ tha majority on diz 1 overall it was a great piece fa sho i like ur imagery, structure, multi'z & tha concept ...but da missing link in it was ur vocab u need work on dat but othawise ur good keep writing & elevating
__________________




Choose words carefully when you address me
You ain't gotta like me, but you're gonna respect me
(Or else) or else you get wet like a jigsknee
Take ten of these and live, that'll impress me
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-05, 08:56 PM   #8
Daubs
NO SURRENDER
 
Daubs's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,604
From: Salford
IP:

safe...........
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-05, 02:06 AM   #9
taz
Banned: Cheating
 
taz's Avatar
 
Posts: 413
From: Quincy
IP:

yo man nice drop i like the nice imagery, good multis and such...vocab wass iight could up on that.....nice sttructure, made it flow nice....8/10 man keep postin and shit

rtf on my sig links.......1
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-05, 08:30 PM   #10
wyteknyte
BeAnToWN rEp
 
wyteknyte's Avatar
 
Posts: 226
From: boston (u.c.)
IP:

good drop....imagery was crazy......flow was nice...vocab was aight.....structure was really good....emotion was high in this drop........good ending 2.....rtf...any link in ma sig
__________________




open mics
leave feedback
boston
gats on da bus
the mic
[/CENTER]
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-05, 09:20 AM   #11
Daubs
NO SURRENDER
 
Daubs's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,604
From: Salford
IP:

ima return them 2 later.
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-05, 10:51 AM   #12
X-tortion
Flyweight
 
X-tortion's Avatar
 
Posts: 108
IP:

This was a good piece that held descriptive content...great vocab & good flowing multis..The imagery was solid, which made ya complexity good & realistic..seeing how boxers fight so they kids can eat..as in this case..The idea was creative as well & held a mediocre depth toward the entire piece..

The only thing I didn't like is that you didn't elaborate on the topic..it's seems more like a good story that doesn't finish..I feel it would've been better if it was extended..but overall it was a nice piece..keep doing what you do
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:48 PM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.