RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > The block > Lyricist Lounge
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 06-17-03, 08:46 PM   #31
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

My girlfriend and I were getting married.
There was only one thing bothering me, and that was
the Bride's Maid. She was a very beautiful and sexy
woman. She sometimes flirted me, and it made me feel uncomfortable.
One day, she called me and asked me to come over to
check the invitations.
So I went. She was home alone, and when I arrived she
whispered into my ear that she wanted to make love to
me before I married her best friend.
I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
So she said, "I'll go upstairs to the bedroom, if
you're up for it, just come and get me."
I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and
went to the front door... I opened it and stepped
outside.
There was my Bride-to-be with tears in her eyes, she
hugged me and said, "I'm so happy, you have passed my
test. I couldn't have asked for a better man to marry."
Lesson learned: Always keep your condoms in the car.
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-03, 08:51 PM   #32
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-03, 10:19 PM   #33
MuhThugga
Middle Weight
 
Posts: 1,617
Joined: Sep 2002
Status: Offline
Text Record: 0-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 2DF8 44D6

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants. The bar tender says, "Sir, do you realize you have a steering wheel on your pants?"

The pirate says, "Ay, and it's driving me nuts."
Send a message via AIM to MuhThugga   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-03, 10:54 PM   #34
16barz
Registered User
 
16barz's Avatar
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Jun 2003
From: Oakland
Status: Offline
Text Record: 0-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 4577 CD9A

there a banana a penis and a salad

the banana says I have the worst life they peel my skin off and eat me

the salad said no I have the worst life they toss me up and cut me

and the penis said (laughing) 'is ganna kill ya' the penis said (Laughing) the penis goes..........................................HEY wait what did the penis say
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 11:07 AM   #35
x-signals
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 28D5 2F72

Quote:
Originally posted by kgm
My girlfriend and I were getting married.
There was only one thing bothering me, and that was
the Bride's Maid. She was a very beautiful and sexy
woman. She sometimes flirted me, and it made me feel uncomfortable.
One day, she called me and asked me to come over to
check the invitations.
So I went. She was home alone, and when I arrived she
whispered into my ear that she wanted to make love to
me before I married her best friend.
I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
So she said, "I'll go upstairs to the bedroom, if
you're up for it, just come and get me."
I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and
went to the front door... I opened it and stepped
outside.
There was my Bride-to-be with tears in her eyes, she
hugged me and said, "I'm so happy, you have passed my
test. I couldn't have asked for a better man to marry."
Lesson learned: Always keep your condoms in the car.


lmao funny stuff
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 12:36 PM   #36
self
one wink
 
self's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,521
Joined: Jul 2002
From: Climbing a mesa
Status: Offline
Text Record: 2-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: B691 B3C4

Word^^^ Also something to live by.
Send a message via AIM to self   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 12:50 PM   #37
x-signals
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 28D5 2F72

Quote:
Originally posted by 16barz
there a banana a penis and a salad

the banana says I have the worst life they peel my skin off and eat me

the salad said no I have the worst life they toss me up and cut me

and the penis said (laughing) 'is ganna kill ya' the penis said (Laughing) the penis goes..........................................HEY wait what did the penis say


i dont get it
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 07:17 PM   #38
MuhThugga
Middle Weight
 
Posts: 1,617
Joined: Sep 2002
Status: Offline
Text Record: 0-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 2DF8 44D6

Quote:
Originally posted by 16barz
there a banana a penis and a salad

the banana says I have the worst life they peel my skin off and eat me

the salad said no I have the worst life they toss me up and cut me

and the penis said (laughing) 'is ganna kill ya' the penis said (Laughing) the penis goes..........................................HEY wait what did the penis say


Sigh,

The Penis said, "My life is the worst. My master puts a bag over my head and forces me to do push-ups until I puke."
Send a message via AIM to MuhThugga   Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 07:59 PM   #39
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

Ok, so this guy is hitchhiking and has been waiting for quite a while. Finally a trucker stops and picks him, and when the guy gets in he notices that the trucker has a monkey sitting on the dashboard, but the guy doesn't say anything. After a while his curiosity gets the best of him, and he asks about the monkey. The trucker chuckles and says watch this, then he smacks the monkey in the head, and it jumps down unzips his fly, and starts giving him a blowjob, after he is done the monkey wipes hip off, zips up his pants and gets back on the dashboard. The hitchhiker says wow! that was great, and the trucker responds, do you want to give it a try? The Hitchhiker say, "I guess so, but you dont have to hit me so hard."
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 08:11 PM   #40
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

Jesus, in a very worried state, convened all of his apostles
and disciples to an emergency meeting because of the high drug
consumption problem all over the earth.
After giving it much thought they reached the conclusion that
in order to better deal with the problem, that they should try
the drugs themselves and then decide on the correct way to
proceed. It was therefore decided that a commission made up of
some of the members return to earth to get the different types
of drugs.
The secret operation is effected and two days later the
commissioned disciples begin to return to heaven. Jesus,
waiting at the door, lets in the first disciple:
"Who is it?"
"It's Paul"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Paul?"
"Hashish from Morocco"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Mark"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Mark?"
"Marijuana from Colombia"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Matthew"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Matthew ?"
"Cocaine from Bolivia"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's John"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring John ?"
"Crack from New York"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
It's Luke"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Luke ?"
"Speed from Amsterdam"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Judas"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Judas ?"
"The FBI, YOU MOTHER FUCKERS! EVERYONE AGAINST THE WALL!"
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 08:20 PM   #41
Aaron C. Vilyus
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 4577 CD9A

Quote:
Originally posted by MuhThugga
The Penis said, "My life is the worst. My master puts a bag over my head and forces me to do push-ups until I puke."


^^^Hey Wait A Minute, That Sounds Like My Life

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

There's Some Pretty Funny Jokes In This Thread

Funny How KGM Is Posting All_Of Them

~1~
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 08:24 PM   #42
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?


It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 08:24 PM   #43
kgm
Have A Nice Day!
 
kgm's Avatar
 
Posts: 446
Joined: Apr 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 1-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 1E93 DF20

What did God say to Jesus?


"I don't care if you are my son, drop that cross one more time,
and you're out of the parade."
__________________
<center>The Internet Sucks!</center>
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-18-03, 09:18 PM   #44
Johnny 6-feet
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 706D C08A

what did the blind, deaf, mute, retarded kid get for christmas?


























cancer!
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-19-03, 05:51 AM   #45
Mental God
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 34F4 EBA3

^^^^WTF!?

Quote:
Originally posted by peyo
lol


^^^THATS NOT A FREEPOST.... lol great response

good shit kgm.... keep em comin

heres one......

A news reporter decided to do a column on old Southern stories. He goes to the hills of Kentucky and finds an old guy sitting on his porch. ''Do you have any stories you can share with me?''
The old guy says, ''Of course I do. One time old Bob's goat got loose, so we set up a search team to find it. We sat around and had a few beers and then went looking for it. We found it, then we all screwed it.''

''Well I can't put a story like that in the paper. Do you have any others - maybe a happy story?'' asked the reporter.

''Sure do,'' said the man, ''One time old Bubba's cow got loose. We set up a search party to find it. Once again, we had a few beers, looked for the cow, then we screwed it when we found it.''

''Well, I can't put that in the paper either. Do you have any sad stories?''

''Sure do. One time I got lost!''
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:58 PM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.