To those with whom are dying---------------------------------------------
I set all sympathy to your lost passion for trying ----------------------
a relaxed motion set from the ocean time your weak---------------
the truth of destination and our souls in which we seek-------------

Your soul is climbing with the ut most hope for freedom--------------
open your eyes its not a fallacy that hearts truly believe in him-----
Fake disgusting liars paste bombs on weak survivors—
catapult your innocence to the integrity of a minor----

you have child like faith and with that it’s all you need—
Your leaving now but tomorrow sets a new light and validates our time to believe ----
Your loss will not be forgotten with in our mind-body-and sight
An understanding reprimanding a lost direction like your vision to the night

Never look back
Cause days grow older when your alone
And laughing is just a weird concept built through grief and the pressure to explode----
So leave today because im a hypocrite tomorrow
departure is a glimpse set with such sweet sorrow





Alright here is a piece i just finished hope you likes---also i need more people for my poetry crew get to me
-1-

upppin

-1--

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I was going to reply to this earlier, but I hadn't known of its existence earlier.

Anyway, this poem really captured your thoughts into words. Very skillfully too. And it gets the point right, people die all the time. And those dying need to be thought about, some people don't think about it at all.

~Shalom~

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Quote:

Originally posted by Bruklor Nec is just dumb

I'm taking that as a compliment.

uppin yall

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Nicely written...

...essence of it all captured so well...with a strong use of imagery and ended well...

...nothing else to say really, one hell of a piece..

...resp...

^^ditto...1!

agreee'd lol uppin

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dont sleep on deacon now not polite

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uppin for some replys

-1-

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upin

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really felt this one man, ya had good vocab and a nice flow, keep it up and spit some more, i'd like to see em

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that aint bad but im not much a poetry critic, im just ridin thru

i felt this one... i really likez it ... got into the flow of it....