just somethin'

look at this kid, he is wicked and wired.
like a fuckin kamakazi bout to be fired.
blowin up like a fuckin granade in ur face.
ripin u to bits and gluen' u back with paste.
wut a disgrace. this kid is on burnin with fire.
these raps are his life, and his only desire.
he likes wut he does and does wut he likes.
if yall dont like this shit then just take a hike.
cause naturaly, u dont know wut rap is about.
this is somethin to him he cant live without.
so weather u leave or not, he will keep going.
continue with this rap that is constantly flowin.
non stop. like all the numbers in the world.
he is 2 the power of infinity all in one swirl.
somethin u cant stop, somethin u cant move.
this is a kid that comes up with his own grove.
own lines, own rhymes all in his own time.
he got all this shit down like a chalkboard in his mind.
all played out like some sort of a design.
wont need a patient for that sort of grind.
cus no one can make it 2 the level he is on.
he raps every day, from dusk to dawn.
even in his sleep he is still rapin along.
this shit is in his mind twenty four-seven.
proable when he dies on his way 2 heaven
he'll rap to god, and god will rap back.
but god cant match his skillz cus he is wack.
god created life, and this kid just improved it.
no way he could stop these styles he is using.

-end-

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im so ill that cancer thinks im its father.

hmmmmm this wasn't really hot... it looks like you just started rapping... you'r on the right track... but try to update your refferances... for instance my style has been called a "pop-culture refferance style" I generally frequently reffer back to things that have happened in pop culture... but it does matter where your refferances are from... they do help for metaphores if used well which can make for some nice one liners... there aren't too many stand alone lines in your verse... and for a bragging post like this you really should have a lot or an ill ass interlocking flow... (which you didn't) ... but keep trying

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truth^^^^

however... it got sum fyre in tha side lines im appreciatin, enjoyed readin this shit man

naturally it needs work... try and improve ya shit b4 u drop it str8 and basically get a feel for how its flowin when u rappin it to urself and put sum evolution into it

Once again, drop some links man................2 links.... or they will get you

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This was aight, for a first or a series of first dorps it's aight, your probably new to the depth game and you basically need to start using metaphors, personification and intense description at times. though sometimes simplicity is a virtue, though you need to stop you self glorification as this won't get you any fans or much recognition. Try and WOW the reader by tackling a hard subject and mastering it. Overall, this was a good start just carry on trying to strive.