Lay Fear Kirk

These false rivers an streams seem to wither an weave,
they're considered diseased leading to what you beleive is a city of dreams.
Souls bid a bitter retreat trying to escape those rhythm of screams
Thus, the decision it brings -- the imminent paradise your hidden between.
These Elysian Fields are a rare sight to behold,
illuminating light that glows fluctuating amongst these Knights of the Old
this trapped prisim is like a knife to the soul.
an entity that fights an unfolds jus inspite of the roles
these bright heroe's roped themselves into ; an eternity doomed.
in turn they're abused after a life of justice left further confused.
when murder's construed with an un-heard of excuse
the only remedy to erase your past is a cure for the truth
an let deceit leak until your left hurt an just fued
an even after a life of heroism an a pursuit of these dreams
this underworld makes it apparent how stupid it seems
until they feel useless an mean beholding construed bliss just scream
no matter how lucid the scheme - if you knew this an beleived
if your deeds lead to this, would you still influence your men.
set your life back, rewind...then do it again?




I carry this notebook grasped as I stride through beach sand,
Feeling the gentle summer breeze as It glides through each hand,
Shifting my sight from dunes, I decide to bid the canvas adieu,
Turning my focus to waves crashing and foamed blankets of blue,
Pushing and pulling through sand, feel it rise on my bare feet,
The only sense of security is when my eyes and the air meet,
Dryness so uncomfortable it comforts me but mystic forces,
Make it tough to come to terms with this bliss misfortune,
These clear rivers a blessing? I've been roaming for infinity,
Are these birds singing freedom? Or groaning from captivity?
Traveled for thousands of miles. Through streams and forests,
Come across nothing that I value or that seems important,
Am I dead or alive? Am I able to escape when my fates cuffed?
Or must I spend an eternity dreaming, just waiting to wake up?
And If I am dead, What did I do and do I even deserve it?
But With noone to reassure me how can I even confirm it?
Nothing can die or rule me.... This land isn't bliss,
Because there isn't any ugly to define it's beauty,
Lessons to learn don't exist, no alarm to be woken,
With no love to be given and no hearts to be broken,
There is no explanation for no crying or blood,
What exactly can you even call a life without love?......



Death.

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nice stuff

lay - you really have a different way of writing, to me anyways, although (i think), your verse lacks the imagery kirk uses, i dont think it takes away. you just use such truth and emotion in every line it keeps me reading, like after every bar i stop and relate it to life, its very descriptive and provocative in a way you can question beliefs and ideals everywhere... so overall, what may seem like an awkward structure, its definately a worthwhile read, good stuff

Souls bid a bitter retreat trying to escape those rhythm of screams
Thus, the decision it brings -- the imminent paradise your hidden between.

kirk - very vivid, dripping even, with emotion, imagery, flow is sick... you spend alot of effort, it seems, in creating a specific atmosphere where the reader can go for the length of the piece, and get lost in it, its really captivating, and for a while now you've been able to do this, so, i've told you before, so fuck ya and keep writing

I carry this notebook grasped as I stride through beach sand,
Feeling the gentle summer breeze as It glides through each hand,
Am I dead or alive? Am I able to escape when my fates cuffed?
Or must I spend an eternity dreaming, just waiting to wake up?

word.

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The Establishment
I am the Batman.

pretty good fuckin piece here.....kirk...you did a great job...and flight summed up what you did fairly well........lay...im impressed..i didn't know you could write like this untill kirk showed me an OM of yours the other day...shit is real good....however...it seems like your addiction to multies is holding you back from more important aspects of topical writing..like...imagery...and emotion...it's not like you didn't have those things...because you did...but i believe they were less effective because of your multies.

none the less..very dope piece..if we still voted for shit around here...i would nominate this for om of the month.

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Time is not long, and indecision is hells cemment. So the well is rented, untill heaven is relevant. Untill then, to be eloquent, sex cells, so le'ts cellibate.

"watch what you watchin...fox keeps feedin' us toxin's..stop sleepin' start thinkin outside of the box and unplug from the matrix doctrine....but watch what you say cause big brother is watchin" - nas - sly fox

The I.H.C.J.S.F.M.T.R.H.P.M.M.W.T.S.M.S.I.T.F.F.W.A.S. O Crew

Thanks both of you.

http://community.rapverse.com/showp...521&postcount=6
http://community.rapverse.com/showp...520&postcount=7

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