u wearin a white tee jus say u a mark
then ima rob when the sky gets dark

when i pull a lick me n my boys feast
look at my gun this bitch is a beast

its a big muhfucka wit 30 of his friends
and all 30 will chase u down to ure end

leave a nice big spot on yo white tee
all cuz u wanted to b ballin g

so i creep, then i crept
sent these bullets strait fo the neck

have yo ass sprayin blood like a super soaker
u cant breath its like u got a choaker

but not one of those gothic fuckin collars
like the one u got cuz i wanted dem dollars

__________________
for all these niggas that say i cant rap, nigga i dont rap any way, i ROBBBBB
-crunchy blac(three 6 mafia)


i get high like the birds and the planes, i get high when bullets hit faces after words are exchanged
-styles p(the lox)

u betta tell yo man wit the gauges im nice, i'll shoot up yo white shirts till yall look like dice
-I 20

dude man extend ur wordplay thats why you lost to YuNg_GuN...lol...
return da favor wit my new shit True Love...

__________________

dude
you had like no vocab at all,ur lines word basic and weak...u need to work on your vocab,wordplay....and all
man elevate

goodluck

__________________

Aight i'll start with the the bad points first..like everyone else said, you vocab needs to be upped, get more desriptive with your words, to give more of a feel to the rhyme.
same with wordplay work on that....sooner or later you get better at it.

As for the good points,
The flow was pretty persistant, pretty basic, but it stayed for the most part. Your structure wasn't to bad, a few line were a little stretched, but that's aight. Anywho keep droppin, the more you write the better you get

Much Respect....

ok kinda simple i'm guessing it was a diss track? cause there that dude named white tee on here.i can see y you got to loses then lolol 2/10

__________________
RePlay
(0,0) 0 KOs

1 noooo this isent a diss track and 2 i shoulda won that battle, and 3 it was jus a quick lil freeystyle, and 4 thanks i guess for the feedback, and for the 5th and final aka ure a bitch n thas the biz, peace

__________________
for all these niggas that say i cant rap, nigga i dont rap any way, i ROBBBBB
-crunchy blac(three 6 mafia)


i get high like the birds and the planes, i get high when bullets hit faces after words are exchanged
-styles p(the lox)

u betta tell yo man wit the gauges im nice, i'll shoot up yo white shirts till yall look like dice
-I 20

A Sinn Wanna Battle Mayne I Need Somethin On My Record So Hit Me Bac Up
At Either
My MSn> DaydrenDipset@wmconnect.com
My emailz The same

dawg....you need to work on that vocab and, some of the lines seemed a little stretched.