|
|
|
|
| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
05-01-05, 08:09 AM
|
#1
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
tried some deeper shit, no title..
IP: 828D 0B7A
The days of 1 on 1 fighting seem to me to be abolished..
You dont face 1 man, just 10men gangs, crews and posse's.. Shit had gone too far, people lose a fight,but that aint accepted.. Guns blasting from car windows...i shouldnt have to expect it.. Dealers approach me, sayin they legit and straight, tyna sell me weed Have to accept it...otherwise the loss of a life will be guaranteed.. People gonna start shit when in numbers, courage is what they lack.. You dont get a punch in the face...they put a bullet in you back.. Saw my own friends shot dead....rushed away in an ambulance.. How can you call this shit a life...when its merely an existance.. drop some feed please.. i will rtf if wanted.
__________________
|
||||
|
|
05-01-05, 08:12 AM
|
#2
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-01-05, 10:31 AM
|
#3
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
uppinnnnnnnnnnn......
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-01-05, 11:18 AM
|
#4
|
||||||
|
New to RV
|
IP: 28AD 5545
I think its okay, it had a good story or whatver but it'll be better if it was longer and had a little more vocab...but other than that...good piece.
~1~ |
||||||
|
|
|
05-01-05, 05:59 PM
|
#5
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
uppin..............
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-01-05, 11:55 PM
|
#6
|
|||||
|
The Topical Juggernaut
|
IP: D35B 3F85
Choppy flow and vocab, but the emotion was pretty good. Keep it up. Peace.
__________________
Blow It - Topical -=Respect List=-
Crhyme Sindicate  The unexamined life is not worth living.
|
|||||
|
|
|
05-02-05, 06:43 AM
|
#7
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
ite thanks.................. UPPPPIIINNNNNNNN......
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-02-05, 02:58 PM
|
#8
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
uppin .
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-03-05, 05:53 PM
|
#9
|
||||
|
NO SURRENDER
|
IP: 828D 0B7A
uppin...............
__________________
|
||||
|
|
|
05-04-05, 10:21 AM
|
#10
|
||||
|
Banned: Cheating
|
IP: E3CA 7CA2
Kinda short. You shouldve made this wayy longer, and it wouldve helped out your sensory detail and cancelled out the poor rhyming. But not all the rhyming words were bad, just some of em. This was just an ok piece. I think you should finish it, and make it into a complete song. Nothing special, just ight for me.
uppin |
||||
|
|
 |
| Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
| Display Modes | |
|
|
Linear Mode
